The Haven
Published in

The Haven

An 80-Year-Old Business Man Gave Me This Shocking Advice as a Teen

I never forgot it — no matter how hard I tried.

“I want you to know,” he continued, “that I couldn’t follow anything you just said because I can’t take my eyes off your chest.”

I let his advice wash over me, like a trash-riddled tide on a Long Island beach. “Excuse me for just one moment while I get someone who can help you,” I said.

--

--

A Place to Be Funny Without Being a Jerk

Get the Medium app

A button that says 'Download on the App Store', and if clicked it will lead you to the iOS App store
A button that says 'Get it on, Google Play', and if clicked it will lead you to the Google Play store
Danielle Kraese

Words in the New Yorker, McSweeney’s, Slackjaw, & The Belladonna. Co-author of Jokes to Offend Men.