Another Stimulus in June? No, But We’ll Keep Writing These Articles Because You Click on Them!
The people demand more clickbait!
With COVID-19 still affecting the world, people could use a boost more than ever right now. Congress came together three times to provide stimulus funds to Americans under a certain income threshold. With millions out of work and in need of extra funds, will Congress come together a fourth time to help Americans?
No, of course not! Democrats hold a narrow majority in the Senate, requiring every Democrat to vote in favor of more stimulus in order to push it through under budget reconciliation. Republicans, on the other hand, have vowed to block every effort to give more money or unemployment benefits to Americans.
So, why did we bother writing and publishing this article? Because you clicked on it! Look, we’re a small publication, and we gots bills to pay. And, in these modern times, nobody wants to pay a subscription fee to read the drek we publish every day. So, we rely on that sweet, sweet ad revenue. And what better way to get that moolah than clickbait?
Yes, it probably got your hopes up needlessly because you’re still out of work and could really use a boost. Or maybe you’re barely scraping by at a thankless low-wage job where you get yelled at by…
