Creepy Valentine’s?
Roses are red
Violets are blue
Does this verse
Mean I’m stalking you?
Question: Is Valentine’s Day slightly dodgy?
Answer: Yes. No. Maybe.
What is Valentine’s Day?
“Valentine’s Day, also called St. Valentine’s Day, holiday (February 14) when lovers express their affection with greetings and gifts.” — britannica.com
Valentine’s Day can be about unrequited love. However, there’s unrequited love, then there’s unrequited love, and then there’s, unrequited love. You know what I mean. One sided love affairs.
‘Popular’ music is littered with suspect songs about love. So, in the spirit of vegetarianism, lettuce look at some music video evidence.
The Police — Every Breath You Take
This classic everyone knows. By today’s standards, and even by then times standards, that shit ain’t right.
Sample lyric: “Oh, can’t you see, You belong to me?”
Creepy scale: Well creepy.
Michael Bublé — Haven’t Met You Yet
Two negatives of working in a warehouse:
1. Pittance pay (actually, to be fare I get paid quite well for what I do).
(B). Being forced to listen to the radio.
Warehouse radio is how I was repeatedly introduced to the Bublé. I learnt of the cultural significance of the Bublé from my local (female) librarians, both in their 50s, who always went a quiver when talking about the Bublé.
Sample lyric: “And I promise you, kid, that I’ll give so much more than I get, I just haven’t met you yet.”
Creepy scale: Creepy McCreepyface
Alice In Chains — Phantom Limb
Men with guitars, not happy with their love affairs? Well I never. By the way, like any good Nu Metal cliché, the vid is dark, occasionally violent and seems to bear no relation to the song.
Sample lyric: “Gonna wear you like a second skin, I’ll haunt you like a phantom limb.”
Creepy Scale: Mad creepy.
Mc Shan (Feat.TJ Swan) — Left Me Lonely
What aging, B Boy, B Girl, superstar DJ, doesn’t go, for MC Shan? Admittedly, this one is only included for diversityness. The song’s actually about the love of his life leaving him for another man. Features one of the world’s most awfullest sung choruses ever.
Sample lyric: “Coincidental how I met her, But when I seen her I knew that I’d get her.”
Creepy scale: The creeps come out at night?
IAMX — Stalker
A duet between a man and a woman, which kinda negates the song’s inherent negative negativous.
Sample lyric: “I will be your shadow, I will follow you, never let you go”
Creepy Scale: “Dude, it’s called ‘Stalker.’”
I’m lucky. I’m happy, secure and in a long-term relationship with all the long-term relationshippy happyness that comes with it. Although, it might be worth, just in case, posting an anonymous Valentine’s Day card through me girlfriend’s letter box in the dead of night, and seeing if she mentions receiving an anonymous Valentine’s Day card through her letter box in the dead of night.
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Special thanks to my girlfriend Hen.
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