Don’t Be Suprised if My Pillow Pet Murders me

He’s still upset that I got rid of his girlfriend

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“A pillow pet? Mom, I’m frickin a adult, I don’t want a pillow pet!”

Eight-year-old me was furious at my mother for buying me a “baby gift” as a birthday present. It took 10 minutes for me to get over it, as I quickly realized Brad was the closest thing I had to a friend. I…