Drumpf and son/clone Mini-T recognize the women who underwent labor on Labor Day. None of those women were present for the honor. (White House)

Drumpf Thanks Moms for Their Labor

White House and Congress scramble to cover his mistake

Published in

The Haven

4 min readSep 4, 2018

While Americans celebrated Labor Day, the White House and Congress silently moved mountains to cover for another Drumpf error of fact. “Today I will address the nation to lift up the mothers honored for giving birth on this most important holiday,” he Tweeted.

Two hours later, Drumpf gave a televised address from the White House celebrating the mother’s who surrendered their “flawless, stretchmarkless tummies to bring our beautiful children, children who hold the highest position in American society, children we do everything to protect from harm as long as they’re American children and not infant immigrant murderers and rapists in training, immmigrant children that whiny liberals waste air trying to protect even as they train in death camps financed by the Mexican, Canadian and Isis alliance to rape our wives and murder our families. The labor of those mothers should have two holidays a year, not just this one.”

Drumpf recognized mothers who sacrificed “flawless, stretchmarkless tummies to bring our beautiful children, children who hold the highest position in American society, children we do everything to protect from harm as long as they’re American children and not infant immigrant murderers and rapists.”

Drumpf then invited his sons Don Jr. and Eric to honor their mother, whom Trump first referred to during his address as “Ivanka.” Barron was also present to honor his mother Melania, although he didn’t speak because he was too busy playing games on his iPhone.

“Look at that boy,” Drumpf said of Barron. “His mother gave birth to a brilliant child who speaks better English than her and always will. And our latest contract says he will get a hundred percent of the three percent share of my fortune I intend to leave him if she sticks with me until after the 2020 elections.”

None of the women honored were present, nor were their pictures displayed on the HD monitor during the address. Instead the display featured photos of mothers and children who shook hands with Drumpf at his rallies. Had the mothers and children not been cropped from the photo, we might know who those mothers were.

Project Memory Hole

This was the first test for the newly installed White House protocol Project Memory Hole, which allows staff to correct deficiencies in the media (and historical record) with the help of Congress.

“As soon as Kelly’s office saw the first Tweet, they called down to the Hole,” Project Director Winston Smith told The Haven. “We revised the old labor symbol. Scratch that. We retrieved the original labor symbol used by artists in the Welfare Payout Administration. The one the commies and Fake Media coopted in their unionist propaganda.”

The new symbol for labor replaces the arm and hammer with an arm and baby bottle. The rounded shape of a hard hat is now the rounded belly of a mother giving birth.

Thanks to the White House, we no know the real labor symbol was stolen by unions. — Thanks to the White House, we now know that the real labor symbol was stolen by unions.

Smith told The Haven that after they corrected the logo, “we told our mainframe, which is more powerful than the one used by the NSA by the way, to find all instances of deviant uses of the labor symbol and restored the correct one. That was just the beginning.”

Republican lawmakers revised the 1894 statute to read: “the first Monday of September in each year, being the day celebrated and known as Labor’s Holiday to honor our mothers who gave birth to our American citizens, is hereby made a legal public holiday.”

According to Smith, Project Memory Hole searched and updated every erroneous reference to Labor Day, and GOP members of Congress met quickly to correct the mistaken references to organized labor in the original 1884 legislation with the more correct references to maternity and birth.

“That communist symbol of birth as an arm with a hammer needs to go,” Oklahoma Senator James Inhofe told his GOP colleagues, who needed no speech to persuade them. “An arm with a hammer symbolizing labor is a subliminal endorsement of abortion. It’s time to end an annual holiday that celebrates the senseless murder of innocent babies.”

The law was revised to read: “the first Monday of September in each year, being the day celebrated and known as Labor’s Holiday to honor our mothers who gave birth to our American citizens, is hereby made a legal public holiday.”