Elisha From The Bible Explains Why He Made 2 Bears Maul 42 Children
A long-awaited explanation from the prophet of the Bible’s 2 Kings
2 Kings 2:23–25:
23 From there Elisha went up to Bethel. As he was walking along the road, some boys came out of the town and jeered at him. “Get out of here, baldy!” they said. “Get out of here, baldy!” 24 He turned around, looked at them and called down a curse on them in the name of the Lord. Then two bears came out of the woods and mauled forty-two of the boys.
Hi, everyone. Elisha from the Old Testament here. I’ve been paying close attention to all the contemporary buzz about social justice and “Cancel Culture,” and I’d like to clear the air about a certain incident in my past that maybe reflects poorly on my character. Specifically, I’m talking about the incident with the two bears.
I may be infamous in top-ten lists of “weirdest stories from the Bible,” but you moderns need to remember that we’re all products of our time periods and upbringing, and I lived in a very different era from you. I hope you don’t judge my character too harshly based upon one bad day I had 2,800 years ago. This is not an excuse for my behavior, it’s an explanation of the context of it.
