HEALTH AND SAFETY
Everyone Loves a Tale of Self-Destruction
As long as the reader is not the victim
Profiles in Stupidity? The Caution-bury Tales? The Brotherhood of Nemesis? The Single Stooge?
There are a host of names for the sure-to-be-bestselling compendium of incidents of idiocy. Perhaps that is the easy part. The most difficult has been the realization of the theme.
Until story-related comments pointed out that accounts of the author injuring himself (or almost so) were favorites, no thoughts were devoted to the preponderance of such tales.
Light-bulb-over-head inducing comments:
“It is indeed wise to respect power tools. Power tools allow you the opportunity to make mistakes more quickly.” — JDJ
“Mary (the author’s wife), please take away anything he owns that is powered by gas or batteries. If he still feels the need to feel useful, get him this.” (Image below) — JC
“Yes, he needs adult supervision. Where are the Lunatics when you need them? Hahahahaha” — Mary (A word of explanation. The Lunatics are the brothers-in-tools who help the author with construction projects and enjoyment during pilgrimages to his “camp” in the Adirondack mountains of NY.)
“Jiminy Crickets! Sorry about your pain, but why is it that the description of one’s mishap can produce such chuckling over coffee and toast in my front room? Ok, maybe it was snickering or perhaps a gasp accompanied by extreme grins and shaking of heads in amazement.” — Robin (not Batman)
“Your self-deprecating entries are among the most charming. I couldn’t say why, but they feel somehow classic, especially to those of us with DIY-damaged thumbs” — Ed C.
How one must sacrifice for one’s art.
But why is it that we enjoy these stories so much? Perhaps they are entries in the “Intelligence is Overrated” chronicles, which we all enjoy.
“Hah, Mr. Smartypants! You’re not as smart as you thought!!!!”
Indeed. And not quite “everyone” enjoys the tales. Some humorless individuals interpret the accounts as bragging and glorification of devil-may-care behavior.
“Sorry, that stunt earns you a Badge of Irresponsibility.” — Mr. Nofun
A tough skin is a requirement for writing humor. A disclaimer may be required.
This account is intended as a cautionary tale and should in no way be interpreted as encouraging dangerous or socially-unacceptable behavior. Only dweebs who need to deprecate others in order to support their egos will miss the humor.
Or something like that.
Perhaps the enjoyment of self-destructive stories is that they point out the inevitable foibles of the human experience. They highlight the notion originating with Allen Saunders in Readers Digest magazine in 1957, and popularized by John Lennon, that “life is what happens to you while you’re making other plans.”
And if we live to tell the tale, particularly with a touch of readable levity, we’re all better for it. Note that none of the stories are about repetitions of the same disaster. Foolish, yes, but not twice.
We must all respect Nemesis, the goddess who enacts retribution against those who succumb to hubris, regardless of how bright we may think we are.
Here are a few less-than-finest moments presented in hopes that no reader will repeat them.
