Extraterrestrial Sightings Are Struggling to Make News Headlines

Hardik Mittal
The Haven
Published in
2 min readJun 19, 2019

In today’s time, news outlets rely on sound bites, clickbait, and flashy pictures to attract audiences with increasingly short attention spans. This has allowed the media to effectively prioritize content and cover only the most important news stories, as indicated by the following news headlines in 2019: “General Mills is giving away 15,000 boxes of Marshmallow Only Lucky Charms,” “Gator Crashes Picnic Date and Eats Bowl of Guacamole,” and “Zoo Offers Revenge on Your Ex for Valentine’s day.”

For content creators, the landscape has become more competitive and extraterrestrials –in particular– are struggling to adapt. Even though they have maintained consistent messaging intended to establish them as an ultra-advanced species that threatens life on Earth, aliens are still failing to reach large audiences. On May 26, 2019, the New York Times released video footage, shot by U.S. Navy pilots, of alien sightings in the sky. Despite spending enormous lumps of money on a state of the art UFO and gracing the front page of the NY Times, the aliens were unsuccessful in being the talk of the town.

In response, content marketing experts in the alien community are directing their species to pivot to a more popular content distribution channel that will remove the need for pilots and retired astronauts as middlemen — social media. Even so, extraterrestrial life forms will likely have trouble differentiating themselves from a human demographic that already uses social media to express its hatred for people while hinting at its underlying need for attention — millennials.

--

--