For Your Own Safety, Don’t Keep Your Viagra A Secret
Modern medicine has provided us with the unique opportunity to extend the natural properties of youth and vigor well into old age. We have medications and procedures that can restore a full head of hair, suck the fat right out of your body, tighten your skin, and if you’re a male way past reproductive age, give you an erection you could hang a step ladder on.
For you older gents out there who may be physically or psychologically addicted to these chemically induced erections, there is a new warning from the American Association of Nurse Anesthetists about the dangers of not telling your doctor about your Viagra habit before having surgery. Medications such as these contain nitric oxide, which open blood vessels, relax muscles, and can cause dangerously low blood pressure if combined with anesthesia. (1) Not to mention the fact that it makes it more difficult for the OR staff to do their job when Mister Happy keeps poking his head up to see what’s going on.
The association also recommends telling your spouse, family members, and friends about these medications just in case you ever need emergency medical treatment requiring anesthesia. This may sound a little embarrassing, but you shouldn’t take for granted that emergency medical personnel will notice your state of arousal and put two and two together. It’s just not worth the risk.
For those who are just too bashful to tell the whole world about their boner pills, there is another more drastic option. Just as they say on the commercials, many of these cases are “just a question of blood flow”, and this blood flow can often be restored without any medication at all. These arteries get clogged by the same thing that clogs arteries in your heart which can lead to a heart attack. Luckily, these blockages have been shown to be completely reversed in those who go on a vegan diet with no meat or dairy products. (2) (3) (4)
I know this sounds extreme. There is a concern that if everyone did this it would have a negative impact on the economy and hurt hard working, blue collar Americans like pharmaceutical executives. And besides, it is a little silly to give up cheeseburgers and pizza for erections when those are the things that give you erections in the first place.
I guess the only solution to this problem is to get our priorities straight and funnel more research dollars into getting this medication right.
