Hours after election withdrawal, RFK Jr. seen bidding on Bane mask at Hollywood auction

HOLLYWOOD, CA —

“If justice cannot be achieved within the system, our hero must rise from outside of it.”

This pronouncement was overheard coming from Robert F. Kennedy Jr. as he spoke with two men dressed as Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles at The Cinema Action Hero Memorabilia Auction hosted by Julien’s Auction House to the Stars, a mere two hours after publicly withdrawing his bid for the 2024 United States presidential election.

Auction attendee Jennifer Sapulski commented, “I don’t know why he was here, or even how he got here so fast. One minute I was watching a clip from his withdrawal speech, and next thing I know, he’s standing in front of me, wearing the same suit he had on at the press conference, except now his shirt is mostly unbuttoned and you could see a Toxic Avengers t-shirt underneath. Maybe he desperately needed some retail therapy after a rough year of campaigning?”

Sapulski added, “He looked good, though. He had his shoulders back and his head up, and walked with a purpose. Had I known he was into movie memorabilia, I would have considered voting for him.”

Lance Starling, a Hollywood pawnshop owner and self-described Watchmen fanatic who reported having a brief exchange with Kennedy said, “The dude was pretty intense. He was mostly interested in telling me about all the parallels between his life and the origin story of Bruce Wayne. [The] guy should take a vacation.”

Sources have reported that Kennedy was seen aggressively bidding on and ultimately winning only one item, which was the featured item in the lot from Christopher Nolan’s The Dark Knight Rises: the mask and accompanying speech module worn by actor Tom Hardy in his portrayal of the arch-villain Bane.