How I made $100 day making my children write poetry
One of the great things about kids is all the nonsensical stuff they create
One of the great things about being an online writer is the tutorials that show you how to do it right and get rich. Just follow whatever they do- tweet a lot, get curated, use grammar tools, and of course be genuine. You know, all that heartfulness and pain? People eat that up.
Of course, if all that fails just write a how-to article on how much you made. Then voila the dollars (and accolades) pour in.
But what if you really just can’t do it. Then what? I mean you can only write so much how-to-get-rich and self-help stuff per day. Well then it sucks to be you (naturally) but there’s hope for you. Especially if you have children.
Just have ’em write some little kid stories. You know, the throw-away kind that every kid writes in grade school like every other week.
Then post it with a little “Oh I’m struggling, but here’s how funny my little kid’s mind works” intro and boom. Instant empathetic article.
I know what you’re thinking. “But Kyp my kids suck” or “Write? I can’t even get ’em dressed for school (back when school existed in a place other than the den)” or “But my kid only doodles”…
No worries. Just post that shit every day. Just make up a title or use a random title generator. Yes these exist and I’d send you a link to my fave but then you might be getting the good stuff. Then upload a picture of their art and post whatever they write.
BUT (and this is the key). Be sure to write these sentences before and after:
Before: Little Susie was just so cute today when she made this.
<whatever content your kid writes or some doodle pics or picture of some profound “sculpture”>
After: Oh just makes my heart warm to see little Susie coming along. I hope you’re all doing great.
Note the half-hearted empathy at the end. People eat that up way more than any boastful stuff about how someone’s kid is about to graduate from college before the age of 9.
Then rinse and repeat every day and soon you too can have an unlimited set of evergreen content.
No kids? Just borrow some from the neighbors. They could use a break anyway plus they probably don’t even know the goldmine they’re sitting on.
