The Haven
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The Haven

SATIRE

How to Leave a Voicemail

An Instructional Guide for Whoever Still Does That

Image by Travis Zimmerman

Back in my day, we didn’t leave voicemails. We called until someone picked up and tried again later if they didn’t, because my friends were poor and “answering machines” (machines that literally answered your phone for you) were not cheap. Or so my mom said.

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