I Am the Dentist Who Does Not Recommend

Photo by Alex on Unsplash

Have you ever bought a product that was advertised as 9 out of 10 dentists recommend?

And no, I’m not talking about vibrators. Not this time.

I’m talking about dental products like toothpaste, toothbrushes, and disinfectant spray that tastes great and keeps your mouth feeling fresh long after you die.

So why is there always one dentist who does not recommend the product that the other nine do?

Have you wondered who that one dentist could be?

Well, stop wondering. It hurts your brain to think.

I am that one dentist.

Okay, so I don’t have what some would call a real degree, but I argue that the class I took in Las Vegas is as real as a dentist degree can get.

If I can get married by an Elvis impersonator, than I can certainly be taught dentistry by one.

After I obtained my license and then lost about two grand at blackjack, I left Vegas to pursue my dream of being a dentist and because I didn’t want that stripper to track me down.

I work in Florida.

No one here questions the degree hanging in my office. Why? Because it’s a great photo of Elvis and I.