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A Place to Be Funny Without Being a Jerk

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I Have a Crush on Everybody

2 min readMar 11, 2025

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Photo by Dhaya Eddine Bentaleb on Unsplash

I don’t know you, but I like you.

I like you as more than a friend.

I like like you.

“You don’t even know me,” you tell me.

That doesn’t matter.

Falling in love is a hobby of mine that I do often but am not very good at.

Truthfully, I’m terrible at love.

But falling for someone?

Having a crush on someone?

Being absolutely smitten and head over heels for someone I barely even know?

That’s easy!

I do that almost everyday.

I do that more often than I exercise.

It doesn’t take much for me to crush hard.

Stranger on the subway who accidentally bumped into me?

I’m imagining our first weekend getaway together.

Cashier at Trader Joe’s who shares the same favorite snack as me?

I’m picking out the song to our first dance at our wedding.

Random person at some event who I just met and have already forgotten their name after they told it me?

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The Haven
The Haven

Published in The Haven

A Place to Be Funny Without Being a Jerk

Ryan Redmond
Ryan Redmond