The Haven
Published in

The Haven

If Infomercials Sold Parenthood. . .

Would you call the number on the screen?

The Pitch

Do you want to have your vagina torn in two pieces?

Well, have I got the thing for you! Oh, wait. That’s not your cup of tea? No problem! Option numero dos is way easier. We’ll just slice your lower abdomen open, remove some intestines (briefly!) and stitch you back…

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