Kellyanne Conway is Back with Some More Words That Rhyme!

Celebrating the six-month anniversary of a simpler time with helpful flashcards

“This is how I see it so far. This is to help all the people at home. What’s the CONCLUSION? COLLUSION? No — we don’t have that yet. I see ILLUSION and DELUSION. So, just so we’re clear everyone, four words: Conclusion? Collusion? No. Illusion? Delusion? Yes. I just thought we’d have some fun with words.”

— Kellyanne Conway on Fox’s Hannity, July 2017

PUTIN LOVER? No.

PUDDING LOVER? Yes.

Contrary to what the mainstream media wants you to think, The President has no connections to Russia. He’s never even met Vladimir Putin, except of course, when he met him last summer, which was the first and only time. What the press doesn’t want to tell you is that the President loves pudding, which is a great American tradition. Hillary Clinton hates pudding.

IMPEACHMENT? No.

IN A BEACH TENT? Yes.

The President has been completely relaxed this summer and knows any talk about impeachment is just another fabrication by the media. Truth be told, he’s at Mar-a-Lago right now. Do you think he’d be at his resort, just putting away, if he had any concerns about being impeached?

GRAB BUTTS? No.

TAX CUTS? Yes.

It’s ridiculous. Our President isn’t interested in grabbing anyone’s butt without permission. What he is focused on is delivering on his campaign promise to provide the tax cuts so many Americans want. Frankly, that’s why they voted for him and he won. Also, he’s a breast man.

PERSONALITY DISORDER? No.

PERSONALLY SHUT DIS BORDER? Yes.

If he was a narcissist, would he be spending all of his time trying to close the Mexican border? It’s all he talks about — he’s always going on and on about how he’s going to build the wall, and it’s going to be the best wall, and no one has ever built a wall as great as his wall, especially not China. In fact, he’s planning on naming it The Greater Wall.

MUSLIM BAN? No.

MUSLIN FAN? Yes.

President Trump is a lifelong champion of Muslin, which, no one wants to report, originally came from a city in Iraq. Some of his favorite nightwear is made from Muslin. Not his bathrobe of course, because he doesn’t own a bathrobe and never has.