Mom Tries Pavlovian Technique to Get Daughter to Clean Up Her Room

Amy Brandt, (56), is a mother living in the San Fernando Valley whose one wish over the past fifteen years has been to have her daughter, Chloe, finally clean up her own room. Despite Amy’s high-pitched nagging and passive aggressive sighing, Chloe (now a Sophomore in college) has maintained a consistently dirty room for several years.

Amy: “I just don’t get it. I have literally seen her take off her jacket, walk over to her closet, almost hang it up, hesitate, and then just throw it on the ground instead!”

Amy states that this messy habit is just one of many she wishes Chloe would change.

“I also wish she would cut her hair, dump that guy Mike who works at Subway, and generally change her career path to something more practical. But, this is the first step, definitely.”

And although Amy was about to give up, after having tried multiple parenting techniques including reverse psychology and just straight screaming, she stumbled across what would be the solution to all her problems. It was in Chloe’s notebook where Amy first discovered and became inspired by Pavlov’s Operational Conditioning technique. Every time Chloe would pick up a sock or take out the trash thereafter, Amy rewarded her with positive reinforcements such as cookies, new Steve Madden boots, and Kendrick Lamar tickets. The results have been life changing.

Amy: “She has changed so much! She cleans her room now on her own…..well, also with the help of my rewards, and she stopped dating Mike!”

Chloe: “I mean, it’s really strange, anytime I hang my jacket back in my closet….my mouth gets all filled with saliva, I start panting, and I just can’t continue doing anything else unless I get a fucking cookie in my mouth.”

Amy has gone on to publish her new parenting book titled, You’re Doing it Wrong: Treat Your Kid Like a Dog, which has topped the New York Times Bestseller list six weeks in a row. Moms across the country have been praising Amy for making their lives “a million times easier”. This past year, Amy has gone on to even launch her own line of perfumes for Moms: “Costco Chanel”, “Indigestion” and “I’m Tired”. When questioned about the potential ethical violations of this method and the sheer weirdness of her book title by our reporter, Amy had no comment and played dead.