Mothers Of Inventions (The Shequel)
It has been said….
“The music biz don’t give women the props they deserve.”
Allow me to once again redress this, and highlight some music shit women invented.
Is redress a pun? Answers on a postcard please.
1. Ofra Haza invented Trip Hop
O H, or, O Haitch, if you’re someone who can’t pronounce, well, basically anything proper, was well established before she became famouser after being sampled on Coldcut’s 1987 UK remix of Eric B & Rakim’s, ‘Paid In Full.’
1st Late 80s Music Person: Her voice makes Hip Hop more palatable.
2nd Late 80s Music Person: Hmm, more palatable Hip Hop…. ‘Trip Hop’….
1st Late 80s Music Person: What was that?
2nd Late 80s Music Person: Oh, nothing.
In the music biz, men using women is quite commonplace. I believe Ofra did not get paid in full.
2. Janis Ian invented Breakbeat
Who’s the Jan with the masterplan? Who’s the Jan.? Who’s the Jan.?
Sorry, I digress.
Janis can claim first dibs on the lighter end of the genre. Think the UK Garage-esque tried and tested formula of a producer laying down some club beats and politely asking a woman to sing over them.
Hashtag: Breakbeat ‘Fro.
3. BO$$ invented F-Bombardment
1st Person: F-Bombardment? That’s not even a genre. It looks like you’re trying to find a clever way to inclu….
Me: Don’t spoil it.
Hip Hop is garnished with expletives, sexist and ‘racist’ slurs. It’s a cultural thing. Or perhaps, more precisely, a male cultural thing. However there are plenty of female rappers who are fond of a well placed swear word. Well, language does belong to everyone, don’t it.
Tucked away on their one and only album, ‘Born Gangstaz’ (mmm, catchy title), female gangster rappers BO$$ unleashed a track so full of f-bombs that it was surprising physics didn’t demand that it collapse in on itself and leave a mahoosive wack hole.
1st Person: Fuck’s sake. It’s not even a proper music video.
4. Wanda Jackson invented Elvis
Back in the 50s
Elvis and Wanda were strolling
Courting and probably
Rock and Rolling
Elvis. The hips don’t lie. Wanda was always on your mind.
1st Person: Didn’t Elvis come first?
Me: If he did, it would’ve shown what a selfish lover he was.
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