Post-Pandemic Taglines for Princess Cruises

Laura Skopec
Apr 27, 2020 · 1 min read
Photo by Peter Hansen on Unsplash
  1. Coronavirus may be gone, but we still have Legionnaires’ disease, norovirus, and seasickness to keep you on your toes.®
  2. You ate and drank too much at home during quarantine, now do it on a boat.®
  3. Help our still-living employees get back to the jobs they loathe.®
  4. Go ahead, bring grandma. She’s been vaccinated, right?®
  5. Longing for the camaraderie of self-isolating with your family in a studio apartment in New York? Our cabins are even smaller.®
  6. Nothing spells the end of social distancing like a 15-foot swimming pool with 200 drunk assholes in it.®
  7. Ignore the CDC. Unleash your inner Florida man.®
  8. Come for the open ocean. Stay because the US government won’t let you disembark.®
  9. Miss the existential dread of not knowing who might be infected? Get the magic back!®
  10. Hey, at least we have childcare.®

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Laura Skopec

Written by

Laura Skopec is a writer, researcher, and comedian based in Los Angeles. Her work has appeared in McSweeney’s and Slackjaw.

The Haven

The Haven

A Place to Be Funny Without Being a Jerk

Laura Skopec

Written by

Laura Skopec is a writer, researcher, and comedian based in Los Angeles. Her work has appeared in McSweeney’s and Slackjaw.

The Haven

The Haven

A Place to Be Funny Without Being a Jerk

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