Self-Help Books Have the Best Titles
I’m no great reader; however, I do love a lot of book-related things, like words and bookstores. Sitting still and reading a book from start to finish is something of a challenge, but recently, I read a book from start to finish in one sitting! It was “The Life-Changing Magic of Not Giving a Fuck” by Sarah Knight. It was pretty good and very easy to power through. What was it about? How not to give a fuck. I mean, that is the absolute genius of self-help books. The content is right there in the title and for directness and plain-spokenness, self-help book titles are inimitable: bumper stickers as books.
Here is a list of some of my favourite self-help titles:
- “I LOVE ME” (all caps really brings it home)
- “The art of EXTREME self-care” (how does ‘extreme’ self-care differ from just regular self-care? I’m guessing rather than looking in the mirror and saying ‘I am proud of my accomplishments,’ you dim the lights, anoint yourself with oils, burn effigies of everyone who wronged you then lower yourself onto a bed of dollar bills as you gaze into the mirror on the ceiling transfixed by your beauty and brilliance.)
- ‘The healing power of the vagus nerve” (ever since I found out that the vagus nerve is connected to bowel movements I have been obsessed with the v-nerve)
- “What to say when you talk to yourself” (Can you imagine wanting to talk to yourself, but then feeling at a loss because you want to keep the conversation fresh?)
- “Ten days to self-esteem (!!!!)” (only ten days? What if you’re a slow learner? What if you have a problem with commitment because you have low self-esteem? What then?)
- “Hell week: Seven days to be your best self” (I bet it’s just seven days of non-stop squats and burpees)
I used to spend a lot of time thinking about potential titles for my forthcoming (any decade now) autobiography, but now I think I’ll spend that time thinking of titles for self-help books, how about “Managing Great Expectations, or Jinxes are FUCKING real…” (actually the last one is also a good name for my forthcoming autobiography.)
