Senior Trump Official Shows Up in Morph Suit to Ensure Identity Remains Anonymous

Sara Zadrima
Sep 6, 2018 · 2 min read

Confusion was abundant in the White House this morning, as one of Trump’s senior officials arrived to perform his daily duties sporting a neon green morph suit and a tie. Other Trump advisors remain perplexed, trying to figure out who it could have possibly been.

We spoke to a few of Trump’s advisors as they exited the cabinet room this morning. When asked for comment, DeVos replied, “There’s no way we can ever be sure. He said he wanted to remain anonymous and clearly he’s done so.”

Several other Trump advisors slowly returned to their desks, mystified by the anonymous green man. “I don’t know how he does it but I truly have no idea who that man is” a bewildered Ben Carson claimed.

We approached a White House intern for a fresh perspective. “I just don’t get it”, she says. “Nobody seems to know who the shrouded green man is, but he sent an email to the entire west wing claiming that his plan was working and nobody knew who he was. As if he wasn’t already sitting at his desk with a big, gold name plaque”.

On the other hand, VP Mike Pence found the disguise becoming. “His choice of attire was a genius decision. A shroud of invisibility. And the tie, well, the dress code of America is business professional, so it was only right.”

The Haven

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Sara Zadrima

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Writing // Production Coordinating // Probably crying or sweating // @sarzad

The Haven

The Haven

A Place to Be Funny Without Being a Jerk

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