The Empty Wallet Shopaholic
My Wife. The most committed shopper of all time
Free is NEVER free.
“Can I get a carpet cleaner for free?” she asks me from the living room.
“Why is it free?” I ask with apprehension.
“It leaks.” She answers.
“No,” I answer
“……………..” That’s what I call a pregnant pause. I’m waiting for the delivery.
“Why not? I’m sure you could fix it.” She says.
See this is where she begins her crafty stroking of my ego. But I’m wise to her ways. I resist the cheap thrills.
“Because we don’t need a carpet cleaner for one. Second, it’s not a leak. It’ll be a convulsive spray of all the disgusting muddy slurped-up goop out the bottom of the vacuum. Shooting it out the side like a pressure washer.” Point made. That should be the end of it.
“You’re so negative. I already googled the vacuum. It’s easy to get parts and they’re pretty cheap.” She counters.
Damn her stubbornness, preparedness, and google skills.
“We should get it,” she states.
See that? She casually turns a “me” into a “we”. Now suddenly I’ve become invested in this transaction. Now there’s pressure in the equation. It’s turned from a…
