You probably know someone or have encountered someone that occasionally likes to bring up the pineapple on pizza argument.
No one knows where the argument came from. People have been putting crazy things on pizza for many years but for some reason, pineapple is a target.
Your friend hates pineapple…on pizza and wants the world to know about it. His relationship with every person he meets is based on whether or not they put pineapple on pizza.
It’s food after all. It’s their business but no. To your friend, it’s “our” business.
Whenever he goes shopping, he asks the checkout people, “do you put pineapple on pizza?” Whoever answers “no” to the question gets to ring up his items.
He wants to open a new checking account. He visits all the banks and asks, “do you put pineapple on your pizza?” to the bank tellers. Whichever bank has the least amount of yes’s has a new customer.
He wants a new girlfriend. If the woman puts pineapple on their pizza, her pizza preference is a threat to the relationship. He won’t date her.
He makes sure all of his friends don’t put pineapple on pizza.
He makes sure the person he is hugging doesn’t like pineapple pizza.
He makes sure the person that walks his dog doesn’t eat pineapple pizza.
He makes sure that all of his clothing isn’t made by someone that eats pineapple pizza.
He makes sure everything he buys isn’t manufactured by a company whose CEO supports pineapple pizza.
He makes sure the pizza restaurant he visits most importantly doesn’t serve pineapple pizza.
Yes, your friend is crazy. His dislike for pizza is so strong that he doesn’t want to have any relation with anything or anyone that had contact with pineapple pizza.
Even if it’s second-hand contact to pineapple pizza from a picture or an ad, he prefers to not talk to you.
You tell your friend to calm down. He looks at you from head to toe and then he accuses you of liking pineapple pizza.
You know that if he finds out you do, he’ll scold you, mock you and tell you why your pizza topping preferences are invalid even though…he’s not the one eating it.
Eventually, you lose contact with your friend forever and you are fortunately ok with it.