Things You Should Know When You’re 60

This knowledge should make life easier for you and those around you.

Larrylambert
The Haven

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Cartoon by Lambert-King

As we go along in life, we should pick up different life skills. Those skills can help us survive different stages of life. By the time we hit 60, we’re nearing the final leg of the marathon that is our life. Hopefully, having, or acquiring these skills will help. And here we go:

1: Know how to fake a heart attack. No, you don’t have to go into full Fred Sanford mode, but by casually mentioning chest pains you can get out of some unpleasant situations. After all, if you’re 60 or older, how much of your remaining time do you want to spend doing things you don’t want to do?

2: Subtly mention you have a bad back. Somewhat related to the heart attack thing, but not as dynamic. There’s no need for you to wait until someone asks you to help them move to bring up your bad back. By mentioning it before a situation arises that needs a good back, you can preemptively shoot down a request to help on a work project.

3: When on an outing take note of where the bathrooms are. As you get older, you have to start acclimating to changes in your body. For example, when at a movie, it’s better to know where the bathroom is than having to spill a Coke on yourself to hide evidence.

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Larrylambert
The Haven

You probably don't know my name, but have likely seen my work. I've written for numerous syndicated cartoon strips and my gags have appeared in national pubs.