Appreciation and Interest Really Do Work

Once again back at the car dealership, this time to have my Civic serviced. (Check Engine light went on.) And once again, I got a ride to work from a shuttle driver who I’ve learned is interested in sports. I started the ride with that topic, asking him about the NCAA basketball tournament.

It turns out, his favorite sport to watch is anything having to do with racing. I do not watch racing of any type. I don’t even enjoy watching track events in the Olympics. What to do? What to do?

First, if I’M not interested in racing but he IS interested in racing, then the situation presents a unique opportunity: What does he like about it? So I asked and learned that, growing up in rural Illinois, this was something his family did on weekends: attend racing events of all types, from dirt track motorcycle racing, to tractor pulls, to drag racing. He seemed to enjoy talking about that, and I enjoyed hearing about it. I grew up in rural Wisconsin, and a lot of people I knew did similar things on weekends.

Second, I shared something I appreciate about racing: the technological wizardry of the mechanics and designers who put the cars together. He seemed pleased to hear me praise this part of racing. My guess is that he is used to people rolling their eyes at his interest in racing; after all, the most commonly broadcast form of auto racing (NASCAR) has a bad reputation among the liberal elite, the type of people this guy shuttles most in this college town. In response to my praise, he shared a story of a recent race in which the pit crew was able to fix some substantial damage to a car and propel the driver into a second place finish.

Third, I moved on to Illinois sports and asked for his thoughts on the Illinois football team, a sport in which he also expressed interest. I know a little bit about pro football, so was able to talk about Illinois’ relatively new football coach Lovie Smith, who used to coach the Bears and (briefly) the Buccaneers.

At the end of the drive, he thanked me (and I thanked him too) and he shook my hand with a smile on his face. I enjoyed the ride. Interest and appreciation: these principles are unassailable.