Is this a conversation either party enjoys?

Michael Braun
The Hearts and Minds Project
1 min readJan 5, 2017

Here’s an example (and exaggerated) conversation between me and a (fictional) coworker.

Me: Hey! Happy new year! How was your break?

Coworker: Oy, I was caught completely off guard by a snowstorm and ended up in the ditch driving home after Christmas.

Me: Oh my! Are you okay?

Coworker: I’m fine but looks like about $1,000 of damage on my car.

Me: I’m so glad you are okay!

Coworker: Unbelievable dealing with insurance on this. These deductibles these days. I’m barely getting any money from them at all.

Me: That sounds frustrating.

Coworker: Of course, the person who put me in the ditch gets away with no responsibility.

Me: How’s that?

Coworker: SUV going WAY too fast starts fishtailing in front of me. I hit the brakes and skid into the ditch. He spins around twice but recovers and doesn’t even stop to see if I’m alright.

Me: Wow, I’m glad the situation didn’t get worse than that!

Coworker: Next winter, I don’t know what I’m going to do, but I cannot take another December and January in this horrible weather.

Me: Winters sure can be unpredictable!

Coworker: I don’t know how you manage to walk to work every day.

Me: Thank goodness for warm coats!

Coworker: Anyway, back to going through my thousand unread email. Somebody shoot me.

Me: Good luck to you, and happy 2017!

That’s the kind of conversation you can have when you resolve to not criticize, condemn, or complain. What do you think? How do I come across?

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Michael Braun
The Hearts and Minds Project

Social scientist by training. Working in child welfare research currently. Trying to stay reasoned, balanced, and sane in America.