The intersection of CEO and Motherhood.
I disconnected and unplugged this past month so that I could reevaluate my journey. Being a mother is my number one priority. Being a business owner is the number one priority of my alter-ego. It can be challenging navigating through the duality of my multiple roles.
I have put a lot of myself in to this business. I’ve regrettably sacrificed nights with my daughter, and days. I’ve chosen my business over my own self care needs, to the point of insanity. But, I’ve been able to adapt to the needs of my business without feeling guilt in the moment. That in itself makes me a little sad. Guilt can help people listen to their conscience- Listen to the voice of their daughter saying “Mommy, you promised you’d get off your computer tonight.”
There is this stigma that go-getter women must buck up and run their house like they run their business. These “take no shit” women must be driven, dominant, and leave their maternal instinct behind, replacing it with a Get It Done attitude and a commitment to put their job first. In the eyes of most, there is little room for both. You are either a mother, or you are a CEO, and when the business is crying and your kid is crying at the same time, you’d better wipe the business’s bottom first, or you’ll be seen as weak or not cut out for the job.
It can be intimidating at times, being a work from home mother. Fearing that I wont get a partnership because my kid was crying in the background during a call. Worrying that I wont get out of a meeting on time to pick up my kid from school. Missing my kid when I’m away on business. I get a lot of responses from people when they realize that I’m a mother- “How do you take care of a business and have time for a child?” “Wow, you sure are busy! Thats a lot to take on!” or the worst: People will congratulate me on running a “Lifestyle business.” I don’t sell Mary-Kay, bro. I am building an empire while making macaroni and cheese.
I’ve been asking myself these important questions this summer- Can I be vulnerable as a mother, while still being strong as a CEO? Can I be transparent as a mother, and still be guarded as a CEO? Can I be intentional as a mother, and still have the energy to be intentional as a CEO?
The answer: Absolutely. There is an edge that comes with being vulnerable and allowing yourself to feel for your business. There is also an advantage that comes from having foresight and being strategic, which allows you to think about the big picture of parenthood and not just the momentary failures.
A business will always be a reminder of the unsteady flow of ups and downs, just as well as motherhood. These two gigs are not mutually exclusive as a woman- it is possible to have one without the other- but learning how to do both together is a truly invaluable experience. Understanding that you can be strong, soft, loving, and assertive. You can be intentional, mindful, strategic and willing to evolve. There is always space for all sides of you, if you can learn to get along with all of them.
