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I Married Him, But He Put His Family First
When Your Partner Prioritizes His Parents and Siblings Over You
When the ring fits, but not the role
In a previous long-term relationship, my then-partner returned from a stint abroad. Naturally, I’d expected he’d want to spend quality time with me, his partner. But after barely an hour, his mother summoned him, and off he went to spend the next few days with his family.
Disappointment, hurt, and confusion were some of the emotions I felt that day. What made it worse was a relative’s snarky comment they tossed my way to rile me up: “He seems more eager to see his mom than you.”
When I confided in a friend, she tried to calm me, saying: “He’s known his family longer than you — it makes sense he wants to be with them.”
Yes, it makes sense, however, I don’t think that’s fair.
He chose to be with me otherwise, he could have stayed married to his family. I may sound peevish, but my love language is quality time. In our busy lives — work, kids, obligations — couple time can easily take a back seat.
But what happens when it always takes a back seat?
In many families, a woman ends up wearing many hats — not just as a wife or mother, but…
