24 clichés: NFL-speak revealed
The NFL is based on a cliché-driven economy. Here is what they really mean.
1. “We have good chemistry”
Receiver: “He throws the ball to me a lot.”
Quarterback: “He catches the ball when I throw it to him.” “He’s usually in the spot I expect him to be.”
2. “They have good chemistry”
Coach: “My job security is on these guys.”
3. “We are building chemistry.”
Player: “I hate training camp.”
4. “He’s a road grader.”
Coach: “We drafted a guy who cannot pass block.”
General Manager: “Our coaches cannot teach him to pass block.”
Quarterback: “He’s gonna get me killed.”
Running Back: “We need four more guys just like him.”
5. “He has a lot of potential.”
General Manager: “He’s about to get his coach fired.”
Veteran player: “No way this guy takes my job.”
6. “He’s a north/south runner.”
Coach: “He’s stiff but he does what he’s told.”
Rookie Player: “The sun rises in the north, right?”
7. “We have a next-man-up mentality.”
Coach: “You guys know how many injuries we’ve had, right?”
Player: “The new guy better not suck and make my job harder.”
8. “I trust coach to run his team.”
General Manager: “It’s on him if we fail.”
9. “It was a 50/50 ball.”
Coach: “He had one job to do.”
Quarterback: “He had one job to do.”
Receiver: “The pass was off-target.”
10. “He’s a veteran leader.”
Coach: “He has more influence over these guys than I do.”
Young player: “The dude is old and slow and he makes me carry his pads.”
11. “We believe in competition.”
Coach: “We have no more idea than you do about who’s going to start.”
Young player: “They told me I had a shot at starting.”
Veteran player: “They’re disrespecting me.”
12. “Give credit to the other guys. They played a helluva game.”
Losing coach: “Jes#* !(^%ing #@$^&!!!”
Winning coach: “We beat them worse than the score shows.”
Losing player: “Get that microphone out of my face.”
Winning player: “Now I’ll tell you what I really think.”
13. “We beat ourselves.”
Player: “We’re way better than them.”
Coach: “I told them and told them how to do it right.”
14. “This award isn’t about me.”
Player: “The trophy is coming home with me, not them.”
15. “They’re a great group of guys.”
Coach / player / General Manager: “I can’t remember their names.”
16. “It’s not how far you can throw it.”
Quarterback: “I can’t throw it very far.”
Coach: “If we had anybody better, we’d play him.”
17. “It’s a team sport.”
Coach: “We blew it.”
Player: “Not my fault.”
18. “The other guys get paid too.”
Player: “They’re better than us.”
Coach: “I haven’t looked at the film yet so I don’t know who to blame.”
19. “I’m disappointed in his off-field conduct.”
Coach: “I’m hoarse from yelling at him in my office.”
20. “He’s a field general.”
Coach: “I want you to think that he’s smart.”
Young player: “He keeps telling me what to do.”
Veteran player: “He cannot run to save his life.”
21. “It’s a business.”
Player: “I got / am gonna get mine, Jack.”
General Manager: “Do you have any idea how many of these headaches I’m dealing with?”
22. “The surgery was successful.”
Coach / General Manager: “He had surgery. He didn’t die.”
23. “We’re just glad he’s back.”
Coach about veteran player: “I might be able to keep my job for one more year.”
Coach about young player: “They just told me his name.”
General Manager: “His stunt just showed the rest of the team how to make my life living hell.”
24. “He makes plays.”
Coach: “I had to answer your question by saying something.”
Player: “That’s why he is paid more than I am.”
General Manager: “I’m a genius.”
Julian Rogers | @thejujueye | Juju Eye Communications, LLC
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