Food fight with my new wife
She trashed my food, just because it has no nutritional value and may kill me
“Allie! You cannot do this!”
“And yet I already did.”
“You know what I mean,” I fumed. “It’s not…”
I searched for the right word. This was our first fight in two days of marriage, and I didn’t want to end things before unwrapping all the wedding gifts. Technically it was two days of cohabitation. We were married, enjoyed a long honeymoon, and upon our return Allie had moved in. That was yesterday.
“It’s not what?” Allie asked with a slight smile.
“It’s not right! This is way south of right. You’re ruining my entire pattern of existence here!”
I was furious. This transgression hurt, and I needed Allie to acknowledge her mistake and make amends. Instead she laughed.
“Your ‘pattern of existence’ is to eat the same crap food every day?” Allie asked. “Honey, I’m going to rock your culinary world.”
“It doesn’t need any rocking. Stop throwing rocks. My world was fine before you stoned my food to death.”
“You’re being a little melodramatic here.”
“You trashed all my food!”
