Trudeau to build slide along Canadian-American border
Canadian Prime Minister Justin Trudeau has unveiled plans for a great slide to be built along the southern border with America.
Speaking about the slide for the first time, Prime Minister Trudeau said it will address the humanitarian crisis facing the United States, where hundreds of thousands of people regularly go to work without pay.
Referring to the slide as the physical manifestation of joy Americans experience upon arriving in Canada, he described how migrants would be met at the end of the slide by immigration officials with balloons and cake, from where they would then be whisked off for a spa and facial.
Trudeau said the slide will be an opportunity for all Americans who want to get out of America while they still can to do so quickly, and in a fun way.
He gave assurances of a virtually open door policy for Americans seeking asylum, with the only requirement being that they are able to go “Wheeeee!” in sheer happiness on their way down. He said in tests this had proved an easy thing for most Americans to do.
Trudeau also called upon other world leaders to extend a hand in America’s time of need, noting that it had been more than two years now since America had had any fun.
