Member-only story
I Regret the Years I Spent ‘Hustling’
Those 6 years were not worth it.
I fell face-first into the hustle trap at seventeen. I followed any big-name who said, “Drop everything and work harder than anyone else.” While I don’t contribute my decision not to attend college to them, I can’t deny they played a part. Like many young dreamers, I was convinced that I would be a millionaire entrepreneur by twenty-two. (For reference, I’m twenty-six, and unless I missed a couple of — a lot of — zeros the last time I checked my bank account, I’m not a millionaire.)
I hopped off the university path and jumped onto the online blogging one when I graduated high school in 2016. My dad and I designed my website, wrote the copy, and followed all the right steps. My brand and topic revolved around self-improvement for other young people. I wanted to empower them to lead their lives through love for themselves and their passions.
While my friends were making new ones, going to parties, and cramming in study sessions, I was reading books about leadership, writing a weekly newsletter, and uploading YouTube videos. They looked like they were having fun, but so was I. I enjoyed what I did, and those big names said to dive all into that enjoyment, so that’s what I did. I convinced myself that I was “making sacrifices” so that my future self could have money and freedom. Thinking back, it was like putting on a cheap band-aid that falls off as soon as you wash your hands.
Two and half years later, I felt as though I’d crashed into a brick wall.
Every article I wrote felt like applying makeup to a face I didn’t like. I was a con artist giving advice when I barely knew who I was at twenty. That’s why I stopped. I pressed pause (I thought it was a pause at the time) on the blog, but continued to work from home as a freelance writer. Turns out, I liked to write and I wanted to be paid since I hadn’t earned a penny through my blog.
Naturally, I bit off more than I could chew. But when I discovered Medium, that didn’t stop me. Just like with blogging and freelancing, I jumped into Medium the only way I knew how: by going all in. And therein lied my downfall (said with dramatic effect).
