Member-only story
Sitting in the Void Was Not Part of the Plan
40s is all about change and transitions
Non-members, read here.
Long before photo greetings were even a thing, I would send holiday greetings every year. My list of addresses to send to kept growing each year as my small family expanded, first with the addition of children and then with the arrival of the dog. Choosing one or more photos from our summer travels and designing the card was something I enjoyed doing each year.
We portrayed a happy family and made it to the yearly collection of many who received these cards each year. As my marriage troubles escalated in my early 40s, the photo greetings in the mail soon gave way to e-greetings delivered via email.
The greetings started to feel like a facade. It captured a single moment in time when we were together as a family, posing for a picture with smiles on our faces. The reality of how I was feeling was far from the truth. I was not happy, and I felt disingenuous presenting us as that happy family. I eventually stopped the tradition of sending holiday greetings.
In my 20s, I found myself chasing that invisible clock, mostly existent because of societal conditioning, which guided decisions on getting married, having children, and pursuing lofty career goals along the way. My 30s were…
