We are Parents! We Don’t Negotiate with Terrorists.
Parenting Advice 101
There is a ton of parenting advice out there:
- Use this brand of diapers.
- Go to this pediatrician.
- Put your kids in excellent schools.
- Only feed your kids organic foods… Blah, blah, blah.
But between you and me, this is the holy grail of parenting wisdom:
Don’t negotiate with terrorists.
I’m not referring to the haters out there plotting to destroy the world with bombs. I’m talking about the terrorists in your house. You know the ones — kids!
They come in all shapes and sizes, and they start early.
Often, their age dictates which tactic they use to wreak havoc.
The terrible two’s tactics include but are not limited to: meltdowns in public places, screaming, crying, kicking, and even biting.
Four is a pivotal moment in the life of a tiny terrorist. They now understand how to wield their power to its fullest.
At four, you’ll likely experience persuasive propaganda and outright rebellion like “No!” or “I don’t have to,” or, my favorite, “You’re not my boss!”
By the time they’re ten years old, they have it down to a science.
Still not sure what I’m talking about?
Sure you do. They start small:
“If I eat my food, can I have dessert?”
“If I clean my room, can I have screen time?”
“If I fold the towels, can I play Xbox?”
It then morphs into:
“Five more minutes?!”
“Everybody does it…”
“My friend’s mom lets her keep her phone in her room…”
That’s when it’s full-on war, people.
Do not negotiate! I repeat, do not negotiate.
Simply draw your line: We don’t negotiate with terrorists.
Then walk away.
Parents, unite!
Yes, they will attack with more of the same. But take heart! You, my friends, are not alone.
There are millions fighting tiny terrorists all over the world. Stand your ground!
We are parents! We don’t negotiate with terrorists!
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