Game of Mad Men: Top Pitches by Don Draper If He Were In Game Of Thrones

The Howling Monkey
The Howling Monkey Magazine
2 min readMay 19, 2015
By Kigsz (Own work) [CC BY-SA 3.0 (http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/3.0)], via Wikimedia Commons

1. We’re not selling Westeros. We’re selling the idea of Westeros.

2. When a woman buys a dragon, she’s not buying the dragon. She’s buying power. She’s buying the ability to soar above men. Dragons are the future, gentlemen, and we want to be in the dragon business if we don’t want to get left behind. Just don’t sell one to our wives.

3. Of course you have to make it out of iron. It’s called the Iron Throne, for goodness sake. Don’t out clever yourself on this.

4. We open on a tavern. A young, fat kid…wholesome sits at a table. He looks sad. We don’t know why. Light lute music plays. We stay on this image, almost too long, but it’s just the right amount of time. Then we hear his mother saying ‘Hot pie! Hot pie!’ The kid looks up, and slowly his sad face turns into a giant grin. He is happier than any kid has ever been. Cut to black with simple lettering ‘Sarah Lee. Hot Pies.’ It’s simple. It’s real.

5. Look, Peggy, the Many-Faced Gods account wants classic. They want mystery. They don’t want a bunch of hippie crap by your creatives.

6. When a man buys a crossbow, he wants to feel like he’s buying more than a weapon. He wants to feel like he is omnipotent. A dwarf wants to feel like he can kill a king. Tell a man that if he buys the crossbow he becomes …a god.

7. You’re seeing this wrong. You don’t sell Budweiser to the Men of the Night’s Watch. You let them sell Budweiser to the rest of the Seven Kingdoms.

8. We show a woman, young, pretty. She is standing outside looking over a cliff at a desolate field. She shivers slightly. A young man, classically handsome, walks up behind her and drapes a coat over her shoulder. She looks at him with pure love. We put up text over this scene. “Winter is coming. Make sure she’s ready. Christian Dior.”

Originally published at www.thehowlingmonkey.com on May 19, 2015.

--

--