The Artist’s Way — Week 5
Week 5 of the 12-week course to build creativity
Last week, I wrote about Week 4 of Julia Cameron’s Artist’s Way course to build creativity. If you purchased the book and are following along, I hope this past week was fruitful. To the rest of you, I invite you to join in and comment how the course is helping (or hindering) you in your lives!
I acknowledge this article is being published a day late. Typically, I would apologize, but I was in Las Vegas visiting family this past weekend. I arrived home yesterday very tired, and with a story I intend to publish tomorrow that fits the theme of this chapter so well, I don’t mind pushing an article back a day.
Week 4 focused on integrity — when we know something to be true, we must live it. From my transgender experience, I highlighted Cameron’s secret feelings vs. official feelings. That is, we have one set of beliefs for the people around us…and a set of beliefs we truly believe. Those beliefs must be held back to protect those around us from knowing we are not who we say we are.
But when we live our authentic lives, asserting our agency, and ensuring those around us respect our right to be ourselves, we open ourselves up to the possibilities of the Universe. Cultivating that connection and the attendant possibilities is how we continue to live authentic lives, closing the circle.
Week 5 centers on recovering wonder — seeing the possibility in our lives.
Week 4 recap
And…here is a recap of Week 4:
I wrote Morning Pages every day this week. That said, I admit several sets of Pages were technically Evening Pages, written around travel or vacation plans. Given the choice between Morning and Evening, I believe Morning Pages are better.
First, when I was tired, I really had to push myself to begin writing. As soon as I started, the words would flow and I enjoyed it. But I believe it’s harder to summon the motivation in the evening when bed is calling as opposed to the morning…when bed calls slightly less.
I also attended my Artist Date. It has become traditional now to go to a coffee shop and read Sailor Moon books. Last week, I had to push myself to read Sailor Moon — I wanted to read a nonfiction book I believe is important for my development. But as Cameron points out in Week 4, the Artist needs recreation. After reading a fun Magical Girl manga, I agreed.
The limits we set on ourselves
Week 5 of The Artist’s Way course is titled “Recovering a Sense of Possibility.” But seeing possibility is more difficult than it sounds. We tend to set limits on ourselves and what is possible for us to do. As a result, Cameron writes we fail to use all the power available to us — the power we began to recover in Week 3.
An interesting line stood out to me. When speaking of tapping into the unlimited creative power of the Universe, Cameron states:
Since everyone can draw on the universal supply, we deprive no one with our abundance.
Much of the public narrative centers on the concept of privilege, which I find to be a very tricky topic. What appears to be a privilege is not always a benefit. What appears to be a disability does not need to hold us back. And of course, each of us faces different barriers in our lives. None of us is capable of understanding another person’s breaking point.
Some readers might point out my youth as a white male disqualifies me from discussing privilege or its lack. I suppose that may be a fair criticism, and I certainly do not want to engage in a game of “You Think That’s Bad…?”
With that said, we typically sabotage ourselves and limit our own happiness more than we are knowingly sabotaged by others.
When we assume we are unprivileged, we discard possibilities that may truly be open to us. What Cameron advises instead is to allow the flow of possibility to manifest itself. The Universe doesn’t need us to tell it what we need. There are far more ideas we could follow than time for us to follow them.
Virtuous productivity
One method many of us use to filter possibilities out of our lives is being available for everybody — except ourselves. Our culture praises this behavior: we are taught from an early age that selfishness is a dire sin. In response, we engage in pleasing everybody, ignoring our own needs in the process.
I relate to Cameron’s point very deeply. Many times, I believed I should be doing anything other than what I was doing. I spent many events I could have missed — as Cameron put it — “seething on the sidelines” out of a misguided sense of obligation.
The truth is our soul — our inner Artist — requires solitude regularly. Only through solitude — a profoundly selfish act — can we cultivate the awareness necessary to tap into what is possible and to begin to do it. When we only do for others and negate ourselves, our Self reacts. It fades. It ceases to exist.
We build a false self, partly as an attempt at virtue, partly because when our Self ceases to exist, attempting to rebuild it is frightening. Continuing to feed the false self allows us not to have to know our authentic selves and grow them. The cycle continues ad infinitum.
A result of virtuous productivity blanking out possibility is to prevent us from truly beginning to understand ourselves. Yet until we know ourselves, nothing can be possible to us. We cannot escape disappointing others in pursuit of our happiness, and we fear that disappointment. It confirms our untrue belief in how wrong it is to care for ourselves.
So what’s next…?
Seeing possibilities is a skill I learned a very hard way — by beginning my gender transition. That said, I’m still a novice at pushing past false barriers I erect in front of myself. In my Morning Pages, I will identify where I limit myself. I will also allow the river of opportunity to flow instead of building a dam to find “the right opportunity” for me.
My Artist Date is already scheduled. I believe I’m going to go meet a new transgender friend, and I can’t be more excited about it! It isn’t reading Sailor Moon, granted, but connection is part of what builds possibility. I’m jumping into the river feet-first!
This week, I will engage with the Universe, and allow her to fill me!
Until next week!
