5 lessons I learned From Sucking at My Job(s)

It sucks that we have to work for money. But it gets worse when you perform below expectations.

I got my first internship immediately after school and for six months, I put in everything I got in a role I was new to. As a ‘visionary’, any other idea at work that wasn’t in flow with the ones I had, I deemed it insufficient to change the world. This didn't go down well as you can imagine.

We were four interns and three were retained after six months. Guess who wasn’t. Take a wild guess. Your boy!

Here are five lessons I learned from sucking at my 9–5

You’re not Steve Jobs

Sorry to break it to you but you’re not the visionary of the company you work for. This one hurt the most because I thought I was. I have the best ideas. I can visualise the future. Well, it turns out that I don’t. Or maybe I do but ultimately if it doesn’t align with the company’s vision, you may want to drop it.

When you have an idea of how things should go, wait for the right time to suggest it to your superior. Do not counter your bosses’ idea defiantly with your own even when you think it is better. Instead, do what you’re asked to do first and then give a suggestion on how it can be improved.

Your job is first determined by the task you’re paid to do before you dream about wearing a turtle neck and giving a speech to the executives, while they all drool and applaud you for being the best thing to happen to the company. (This was me. Uncontrollable tears)

Essentially, why were you hired? Yup, go do that first Walt Disney.

The biggest vision you can have while at your job is the company’s mission.

‘Assumption’ is the beginning of the end

“Oh, I assumed it was this way, so…”

The end of that sentence is always rewarded with a strong reprimand. No one in the history of professional work has ever gotten a reward for assuming. I’m weird because I always think I can break the mould. So I assume and assume again till I assumed my way into a query.

Assumptions are like the love interests that lead you on and then when you ask them the dreaded question, they’re gone. Poof! What a shame.

Before you begin a task, ask all the necessary questions and more if you need to. Better is the clown at the meeting than the fool when it’s time to review.

The best assumption is to assume you know nothing about what you’ve been asked to do until you clarify everything.

“We’re just friends”

Yup. You should have really asked for clarity at the start. Save yourself the heartbreak.

Assume Nothing, Seek to understand everything.

For goodness sake, learn how to play office politics.

If you’re anything like me, then you believe you can do your work in private and not have to blow your own trumpet or be in people’s faces. Yikes! That’s your ego, hiding in plain sight. It is a lie from the pit of hades, sent to ruin your professional life.

In one of the companies I worked for, we used to have weekly remote calls. Everyone would go on about their plans to prevent world war 3 while Ayomide in all his humility wouldn’t rave about his own work. I suck.

Don’t be like me. Buy the biggest trumpet in town and blow it. Don’t be an ass about it of course. Compliment your colleagues and superiors frequently. If you work remotely, show up at the office from time to time — out of sight is out of mind.

Communicate your way to being loved.

If u want to work in Corporate, then u should know how to play Chess.”
― honeya

Late work is zero work.

Oh man oh. You either do it before the deadline or you didn’t do it all. This is a self sub. No matter how perfect it is or how much effort you put into it, if you submit your work an hour after the deadline, you might as well not have done it.

I mastered this dark art and I’m writing this article to show the rewards. My sincere excuse is I have a short term memory. Crap delete that. There’s no excuse.

Do whatever you can to begin your task and execute it on time. If you can’t finish on cue, communicate to your superior ahead of time. That way you can maybe gain some respite.

Every work you submit late is trust going down the drain

Whatever happens, Your attitude is up to you.

When I’m not the greatest fan of an action or circumstance, my attitude takes a nosedive into the abyss of nonchalance. This is a terrible way to live or work because the greatest impact stories our world has seen was done when people got their head down and did what nobody else was willing to do. Even when all the odds were against them.

You won’t always enjoy your job no matter how much of a dream job it is. There will be days you will scour the internet looking for a better opportunity while your manager piles more pressure on you to deliver.

Regardless, put in your best. Show up every day. Go the extra mile when you can. Take responsibility for your mistakes and wins. Your future self deserves your best self today.

The most basic thing you can control is your attitude. Sink or swim. Your choice

You probably know most or all of these lessons already, but knowledge is one thing, the action is another.

So turn up to your present/future job with gusto and give it your best shot. Go kill your 9–5