I Have Made Peace With Death Because of DMT
…And this is why.
Disclaimer: Before you continue reading, please remember:
- I respect what you believe in.
- I am not asking anyone to follow my beliefs.
- I am not advocating for anyone to partake in any illegal activities.
- I am not trying to start a cult.
- I am only sharing my point of view and explaining why I have come to the conclusion that I have.
- You are an adult.
- Think for yourself.
We all have a theory on what the afterlife may or may not be.
This is mine.
In 2008, my grandmother was dying. She only had days left to live and I was struggling with the reality of her demise. Then one night, I received an invitation from my friend Dustin to join him and a few other friends to try DMT, a psychedelic substance that provides a mystical experience. When it was my turn, all of my friends sat around me sitting silently in the dark. I laid down, smoked the DMT from a pipe, quickly inhaled, then closed my eyes. Ten minutes later, I emerged from my trip with a new perspective. I had made peace with death.
Don’t get me wrong. I am terrified of the pain of death. The pain of death is the most tragic part. I don’t want to experience the feeling of drowning, being burned, murdered, decapitated, or lit on fire. If I am lucky, I will get to live to be a hundred-year-old Filipina granny, warm in my bed, surrounded by loved ones, and being pumped with so much morphine that I have no clue that I am even dying.
But after doing DMT several times, I feel as though I have gone through the simulation of what death may someday be.
Ayahuasca + DMT
For those that don’t know, Ayahuasca has been made by indigenous peoples for hundreds of years in South America. It is made from several different types of plants, and the ingredients vary from place to place. The main ingredients of Ayahuasca — Banisteriopsis caapi and Psychotria viridis — both have hallucinogenic properties. Psychotria viridis contains N,N-dimethyltryptamine (DMT), a psychedelic substance that occurs naturally in the plant. When one partakes in an ayahuasca ceremony, this trip can last for hours.
If safely monitored and applied correctly, there has been ongoing scientific evidence and early studies that show Ayahuasca is not addictive and has actually been linked to a reduction in substance use disorders and related psychosocial problems. Ayahuasca has been proven to help regulate mood, reduce depression, anxiety, and even post-traumatic stress disorder. Studies have found that people walk away from ceremonies with a new, spiritual outlook on life.
DMT is a simple molecule that is found in hundreds of species of plants and is also thought to be produced in tiny amounts in the brains of mammals. Many believe that endogenous DMT (DMT produced naturally in the body) might be involved in spiritual or out-of-body experiences. While it has not been agreed upon by scientists, clinical psychiatrist Rick Strassman, of the book, DMT: Spirit Molecule believes that the pineal gland excretes large amounts of DMT during birth and death, and for a few hours after death. However, there are some people who believe you can activate the pineal gland to produce enough DMT naturally by opening the third eye through yoga or meditation. It has also been speculated that people experience this soon as they have a near-death experience.
The wonders of this hallucinogen have captured everyone’s attention. A decade ago, DMT wasn’t a subject that was publicly spoken about. But over the last few years, DMT has become widely available within the black market. As more people engage, DMT has slowly become normalized among society and through various media outlets. Today, DMT is now featured in many shows, movies, documentaries, books, and podcasts.
Since I was a teen, I have been consuming psychedelics for more than half of my life. I have tried nearly everything and I am proud to say that I have never had a bad trip. Not once. (Knocks on Wood*) Although I have never participated in an ayahuasca ceremony (it’s on my bucket list), DMT is the only psychedelic that has literally placed me in another dimension. A dimension where I had completely left earth. I no longer even knew what earth felt like. My body and my mind were separated and sent to a place I had never seen before.
If the theory that DMT could naturally occur through meditation or near-death experiences, then this can explain why people from all over the world, from different backgrounds, cultures, and religions, have been drawing their version of sacred geometry for centuries.
“Sacred geometry” is a broad umbrella term covering many studies, but it relates specifically to the belief that there are geometric patterns, shapes, and mathematical formulas that are central to life, creation, and the universe. Islam, Christianity, Hinduism, and Judaism have all depicted this divine art. Each time I have engaged in DMT, I vividly see this. This is what others have also seen when they tap into their third eye.
When I first engaged with DMT, I had an ego death. I had completely lost my sense of self-identity. As my eyes were closed shut, I heard wind blasting through my ears. I was transported at the speed of light through a spinning portal of sacred geometry until I landed in a place where my soul was floating in a pure white room with a white door. It felt as though I was absent in time. The world as I knew it no longer existed. I died. I was nothing. But yet, I felt as though I was part of everything. I felt no fear. While I was in the white room, traces of colors would sometime appear. But before I could open the door, I had left the room as fast as I had arrived. And then I had awoken. I wanted to go back. What felt as though I was part of an infinite reality, I was told that I had only been gone for ten minutes.
What I found interesting is that after I went through my first trip, my other friends experienced the same realm. I would like to think that this is no coincidence. Some have referred to this as the “waiting room.”
White room. White light at the end of the tunnel.
These are all general characteristics that are described by many who have had a near-death experience. My theory along with others is that this waiting room is an introduction to the other side. I was fascinated. I was calm. If this is what my grandmother was about to face, then perhaps dying really was the next adventure.
When I underwent my second trip to the other realm, I soared through the white door. A light buzzing began to hum through my ears. Suddenly, I was in another white room where my soul was laying in an open coffin. Lingering above me, I see an indigenous man that is wearing a black bowler hat and two braided pigtails. Silently, the man peers down over me and a giant ghostly hand reaches out. Over and over again the hand sweeps over my soul and runs right through me. Then once again, I was sent back to earth.
Now that I have done DMT several times, I look back and understand what this significant trip had meant. I had accepted death, and as the hand grabbed me, I was reborn and ready to journey on towards the next realm. As ayahuasca is a cultural practice among the indigenous people of South America, it made sense as to why I was greeted by this man in a bowler hat. No one else could better understand this other realm than the indigenous tribes of South America.
For my third trip, I was transferred to a galaxy of stars where my soul was lingering above a planet. Miniature bluish-green aliens that looked like elves with little hats were circling me and the planet. They were like little ants that were continuously dancing around without any purpose. Just like the indigenous man, the alien elves never said a word.
To this day, I am still unsure as to what this particular trip may have meant. Was it so that I can see that there is life beyond our planet? Were these elves doing the work for a great being? Who knows. Yet the most curious part of this trip is that many people all over the world can describe the exact same elves.
How is this possible?
On my fourth trip, Dustin had begun to heavily research this profound phenomenon. “As you enter your trip, go in with a question in mind,” he said. By then, I was twenty-one years old and my grandmother had recently passed away. At this time, I was struggling with the idea of ending a seven-year relationship with my first boyfriend, Clinton. Throughout the years, Clinton was emotionally and physically abusive. But I was terrified to leave him. He was all I knew.
So when I entered this new realm, I was sent to a dark room where Hindu scriptures were glowing in neon green along the wall beside me. Without speaking, a magnificently dressed Indian woman stood before me in a silky blue sari. She wore her hair in a bun and was adorned with gold bracelets and gold necklaces. Her beauty was indescribable. As she bent down to greet me, she leaned closer towards me. I telepathically told her, “I want to know what love is.”
Then in a flash, my soul had blasted into a 3D dimensional room where an image of a glowing, lime green skeletal body was floating in midair above a round, black pedestal. Slowly, the body was rotating in the middle of the room so that I could see all sides of the human form.
I couldn’t comprehend what any of that meant but when I returned, I told Dustin what I saw. Without knowing what I had asked the divine goddess, he casually said, “Each color in the DMT world has a meaning. From what I have read, lime green means love.” Hearing this overwhelmed me with a sense of tranquility until Clinton had barged into my bedroom and started yelling at me over something very remedial.
I saw this as a sign. His anger had ruined the serene mood that I had temporarily felt. It struck me. He was not the epitome of love. He was not my soul mate. My soul mate would never treat me like this. My grandmother never wanted me to be with him. None of my family did. The next day, I realized I loved myself too much to waste my time on so much negative energy. So I gathered the courage to end my relationship, and then I commenced on the journey of singledom for the very first time in my adult life.
On my latest trip, I was pummelled through a red and white swirling portal where I was welcomed by a ringmaster in a top hat. The ringmaster appeared to be part alien, part human. He took off his black top hat in one hand and then used his other hand to hold a thin black cane and bowed towards me. Although the ringmaster did not speak, I understood what he was telepathically telling me. “Welcome to the circus. Welcome to the freak show. We are all mad here. Uncage yourself from the prison of earth. Nothing matters.” he said with a big smile. Behind the ringmaster, I could see vague outlines of human bodies floating in mid-air doing acrobatics. After viewing this spectacle for some time, I was transferred back to my body once more.
I was actually surprised when I saw this realm. My previous trips felt much more serious in nature. But after leaving the circus, my soul was uplifted. I was beginning to understand that I have absolutely nothing to fear. So I might as well relax and enjoy the ride in this life and the next.
I am now thirty-three and these vivid trips to the other side continuously play in the back of my mind every single day.
So what does all of this mean? Was this just an elaborate figment of my imagination? Even if I wanted to, there is no way I could have possibly made any of this up.
While some try to disregard this as a meaningless hallucinogenic, how is it possible that others have also seen what I have seen?
Why are these trips universally understood by anyone who has opened their third eye?
All over the world, people have come forth about the dimensions and realms they once visited. The white room. The alien elves. The circus. The mystical entities. All of these symbolic visions were described by others in great detail. They had seen the very same images that I had also witnessed. Prestigious universities and scientists such as John Hopkins are even conducting research trying to understand this supernatural phenomenon.
The only real explanation I can give is this.
The Indian goddess was trying to show me that no matter the gender or the race, in the end, we are simply skeletal structures of the earth.
We truly are one.
We truly are connected.
We are built to love.
We are built to love ourselves.
We are built to love each other.
These natural substances were planted on earth to help us become aware and better understand who we are and where we will go. Perhaps it was made so that we no longer fear death.
Who provided these tools on earth? Aliens? A supreme being? That, I don’t know. But these tools are here for a reason.
The deeper you go into the realms of the DMT world, the more you transcend through time and space and you understand the complex dynamics of this mystifying universe.
But from what I have seen, there is another journey we may be able to pursue.
The concepts of the unexplainable are illustrated through DMT. Spirits, ghosts, aliens, Gods, dreams, and miracles have been spoken of for centuries. They are still all very real to me. But I believe that when we channel our third eye (naturally or psychedelically induced), we gain an inner intuition or sixth sense that allows us to subconsciously expand our mind and meet these enigmatic concepts soon as our ego has died.
Although all of this may very well be just a mystical notion arisen from psychedelics, I can’t help but feel that this is the most tangible proof I will ever have in this life that there is another life. There is a greater purpose.
And that gives me peace of mind.