Stereotypes of Large Families
Anytime you hear someone say they have 7+ brothers and sisters what is your immediate reaction? Amazement? Are you weirded out? Questions on questions about how their family functions?
With reality television shows such as “19 Kids and Counting” and “Jon + Kate = 8” big families are commonly stereotyped and grouped into large generalizations and misrepresentations!
I find these stereotypes funny yet sometimes offensive! No my family is not amish or homeschooled. In fact I would argue my family is chaotic, busy, humorous, and enjoyable to be around….well sometimes.
Eight common stereotypes are presented and their counter arguments to prove large families function pretty much as normally as smaller families do!
- Big families aspire to be like the Duggars: I would argue this is the biggest stereotype out there, whether five kids or ten, many people assume that big families want 19 children! This stereotype is so incredibly false, many large families would not go to extremes like the Duggar family with 19 children! The Duggar Family blog touches on controversial topics such as marriage, chaperoned dates, “a personal conviction that both Jim Bob and Michelle share” about how no dancing is allowed. Even the Duggars would argue they are different compared to other families. Alyssa Toomey for ENews website writes the Duggars “have all been raised with strong, conservative Christian values” so strong that they believe “a couple’s first kiss should be shared at the altar” they are not allowed to dance or celebrate Halloween as it promotes un-christian values. These would be considered extreme conservative Christians. There is a difference between wanting many children and having as many as the Duggars! No most families do not aspire to have 20+ children.
2. Amish or Mormon or extremely religious: Yes, my family is Catholic. However, we do not wear floor length skirts and walk around in a prayer circle holding the bible converting people to our weird christian orthodox or conservative baptist religion. We are just regular people who try to go to church once a week, and may or may not actually make it there.
3. Eating means every man for himself: Better grab any food in front of you and eat like an animal because otherwise someone else might grab it before you! False! Eating in a big family may be a little chaotic and noisy but there is plenty of food and we do not eat like animals!
4. Children wear used hand-me-down clothing: Okay, before we bust this stereotype, what family doesn’t hand down clothing! I mean truly if a kid wears a t-shirt four times before he outgrows it, it would just be fiscally responsible to hand it down! In reality, yes, I wear clothes from my sisters all the time! But I also get my own clothes when needed, in fact I would argue my younger siblings have gotten more new clothes than I ever did!
5. Everyone is homeschooled: This stereotype is just funny, when I bring it up to my mom she said she would go mentally insane if she had to homeschool her children! All nine of my brothers and sisters and I have been in an education system since we were in kindergarten. Most large families are, homeschooling is on personal choice and preference, its not strictly a large family ordeal.
6. A van is the only form of transportation: Unfortunately for the first 16 years of my life this was true, a 15-seater van was just the best mode of transportation! But now with many larger sized cars this just is not true anymore, suburbans, ford flex are both cars that fit about eight people and are used by many large families!
7. Household is run with Captain-Von-Trap-Military style: No we do not get whistled at, or call my dad captain, or march around the house. In fact, my dad is probably the most emotional soft spoken guy I have ever met, if anything my mother runs the house. Regardless, households function with order AND creativity, the best of both worlds.
8. Days not being homeschooled consists of harmonious singing in the country: Well let me tell you, my large family could not harmoniously sing for the life of us, in fact we sing “Happy Birthday” so poorly we sound like a group of dying animals. Even if a family could sing beauitfully together, frolicking through the wooods would hopefully not be where they would be sharing that gift! Once again, a false assumption.
Moral of the story, small or large, families operate differently from one another. Some families are calm, others are chaotic, some are loud, others are quiet. Every person has a unique personality and character traits about them that make them a special person!
Glenn Boothe, on his website, describes perspective as “the ability to gain some altitude and see things from a different point of view” and is vital to our ever changing world today.
Every person brings a unique perspective to the world, without these perspectives the world would be uniform and boring. Be an individual, be unique, and bring happiness and joy into this world. Whatever form that may be, get to know other people’s uniqueness before we quickly judge them by their individuality.
