If you positively impact one person’s life, you impact the world entire
When numbers don’t tell the whole story
“I wanna learn” — he said. And that was enough to convince me to stay.
Last week, I delivered a workshop at a public speaking convention. I had worked hard and prepared for it. Over the previous two weeks, I had tested it with the members of the Toastmasters club I lead as President. I made changes based on the feedback I had received. Then rehearsed it once more in front of my former boss — now a good friend of mine.
On the day of the event, I was positive, excited, enthusiastic — and a bit nervous. At that time, I hadn’t realized yet that my workshop was scheduled simultaneously with a storytelling contest. When this was brought to my attention 30 minutes before the start, it became clear to me that, naturally, people would go to the contest.
I experienced a few minutes of disappointment. But you know what? I could let go of it quite quickly. Why? Because I went through this before.
About 3 years ago, I created InSpiral, a group dedicated to delivering inspiration and learning opportunities in all aspects of life, to its members and to the community.
At some events, we had 6 people showing up. I remember the frustration and disillusionment: my ego thought my efforts to contribute to the community “deserved” better outcomes. How short-sighted. Little I knew back then that small groups are the best incubators for new programs and initiatives.
The ego has its own way of measuring success: he looks into dimensions, magnitude, grandeur. He believes numbers are more important than feelings, depth, and energy.
Eckhart Tolle, one of my favorite spiritual teachers and writer of the amazing “The Power of Now”, told once a story that I always recall when I catch myself thinking that the number of participants to an event is the main success metric for what I try to offer to the community. Here’s what he said:
“Once I was going to deliver a talk about The Power of Now. Only one person showed up… and he thought it was a workshop about time management”
Tolle could have quit after that disappointing night. But he didn’t. And by now he positively impacted the lives of millions of people. And that includes me: he has been my main source of inspiration and awakening during the darkest period of my life.
So here’s what I learned: all I can do is offer myself and my skills, give the best of me while staying detached from the “numbers”.
Last Saturday, when it was time to begin the workshop and only one person was in the room, I was ready to cancel it and attend the contest. I was peaceful: I knew I had good content… something that I could leverage anytime later, at different events.
Then Ivan entered the room. Never met him before; he approached me with a genuine smile.
“If it’s only the three of us, I guess we should cancel the workshop” — I said.
“I wanna learn” — he responded. “I liked the description of your workshop. I wanna hear what you have to say”
And that was enough to convince me to stay and deliver what I had prepared.
Two minutes later, 6 more people entered the room: a few known faces including Gábor, a very good friend who’s part of InSpiral too.
I enjoyed and experienced flow for the following one hour. I gave all I had, I wanted to honor the presence of those eight people that decided to listen to me, instead of attending the contest.
In the end, Ivan approached me again:
“Thanks for this, it was really good. Also, I like that you didn’t seem too disappointed when you were considering to cancel the workshop. And then you were open to deliver it even for only two people. You remained calm and confident”
In that very moment, I realized I had won my own contest… against my ego.
A few days later I received a long and very detailed feedback from Gábor. I was impressed by the time he must have spent writing this down: I took it as a sign of care and connection… I was touched.
Feedback like that is rare and priceless; such insights will help me improve the content and the delivery even further.
But the story isn’t over: on Wednesday I received an email from Ivan, sharing his thoughts about the workshop. Another invaluable set of considerations I can use for the future. Yeah!
I am so grateful he had convinced me to stay and share what I had to offer. Thanks Ivan.
There are times when we realize we have more to offer to others than we used to… we feel an untapped potential that wants to be released. And when we seemingly get the opportunity to impact more people, for example by leading a larger organization, organizing an event, or simply speaking at a conference, we may think that ‘the number of people’ that we reach is the measure of our success.
But life has different ways of measuring value.
My all-time favorite movie, Schindler’s List, has a number of scenes that deeply touch me every time I watch it. But there’s one that inevitably brings tears to my eyes.
That scene starts with these words (quote from the Talmud):
“Whoever saves one life, saves the world entire”
I know… my story has a little to do with saving lives. Yet, this sentence serves me as a constant reminder that the good we do for others is not to be counted or measured, and it produces ripple effects that we can hardly imagine nor comprehend.
If some of you don’t think you can save lives (but I believe we all can), then let’s phrase it this way:
If you positively impact one person’s life, you impact the world entire.
Would you agree?
