Facebook, Instagram, Twitter & Tumblr’s Harm To Our Reality

Harm To One’s Mental Health & Perfect Reality:

Being on social media can have its positive benefits such as advocating and spreading awareness about issues and things like disease, physical and mental illnesses to many other things.

Though it can also have its negative benefits being it can cause others to be cyber bullied as per its as been known that its easy enough to have negative comments from bullies online (not just face to face in person) affect our mental health such as lowering our self esteem, causing trauma even, mental health issues, fears and much more!

Social media is something that most or all teenagers become quite addicted to any an early age starting in middle school or high school. Social media and games on our handheld devices and game boxes, can lead to some mental health issues if it gets as bad as addiction and even as a way to take a break from the real world.

As much as we want to spend time in the virtual world, it’s not healthy for our brain to spend that much time. And as hard as it may sound, we gotta gradually pull ourselves off of them. We gotta do what we can to spend less time on social media yet the virtual world and more time in the real world where everything both the bad but also the good happen.

And another fact to point out here, is that the virtual world such as Instagram where we all post about our life, really only shows how perfect it is but in all reality no one’s life is perfect and nor are we as humans.

That’s just one important fact about our reality, it’s imperfect and that’s not a bad thing at all. It’s also healthy for our brains to strive for imperfection instead of perfection.

We all can find ourselves caught up with society’s expectations and standards to meet in order to gain society’s validation and acceptance. So that we can be happy but as we all may have already learned from our own experiences, this is not the kind of validation or acceptance that we need to strive for. We shouldn’t strive for what society calls: perfect.

In fact, screw trying to be perfect. To me, I believe that we need to spend our time on earth striving for something that is more realistic and healthy for our brain than anything else in the world. And that is striving for imperfection. Society wants us to form ourselves into being perfect human beings and citizens of society, though this can be easier said than done. But the fact that stands here is that we need to fight against these people of our society and be who we wanna be. Keep in mind that society will judge you no matter who you are: fake or not.

So stop wasting your valuable time and go make the best of it by making it your own. Be yourself, be happy, go do what makes you happy, laugh out loud, be goofy and proud of who and all that you are, flaws and all. So who cares about what society thinks anymore. What matters most and what stands is what you think about yourself. Society isn’t responsible for your life nor for everything that you do with it, so go and live it however you like!

Don’t let your pride get in the way of something that you really want. ~ Mal, Descendants 2

We all think we know what we want, but a lot of the times than not, we get too caught up in so many things that society wants from us and what they want us to do to earn their validation, we only end up more unhappy, unsatisfied.

So we find ourselves stuck in this repeated pattern. We know we want, and deserve to live a better life that we want to live and to be happy; but we end up stuck living the life society wants us to because of the things that don’t really matter in the long run. And that is to earn/receive their validation/acceptance.

So how do we change this pattern? Well we gotta grab all that we have and use to to fight for the life we actually want. It’s gotta take everything we have and remind yourself of “how badly you want it” and let that be your guide and your motivation.

Debate: Is beauty only skin deep?

The nation of of Troy was charmed by the beautiful Trojan horse. They neglected it to consider what was inside. And they lost everything because of outer beauty. Don’t be fooled by a pouty rapper. I mean who keeps the wrapping paper. There can be absolutely no debate that the quest for outer beauty at the expense of one’s inner self is a road to personal destruction.

The people make assumptions. I’ve been labeled a jock and a cowboy. And this is from my friends. But here’s a little secret. I like school. I do pretty well. You and I may look at me and assume: baseball player. I look at me and I know I better get good grades. Because what’s on the inside has to be more important than what’s on the outside to get into a good college and into a good life. Because beauty is not skin deep.

I’m here to argue today that beauty is actually skin deep. So I’ve done some research and I’ve learned that it is. When you get compliments from people who don’t ordinarily compliment you. When people look look at you differently. Packaging does matter. I wasn’t pretty, then I was. This is a world where pretty seems better somehow. Which is too bad but it’s not debatable. However, I also learned that if you get swept up by what you are on the outside, you can lose who you are on the inside.

Even though it’s easy to be fooled by the beauty of the Trojan horse. It’s real power comes from the army within. Intelligence, compassion., integrity, courage. That army is the real you. No matter what you look like. So even though beauty is skin deep, beauty is nowhere as important as the army inside. And I’ll try not to forget that.

Example: I continue to not understand anything. That’s what’s so beautiful about you!

I’ve learned something really relatable and understanding from this quote in the movie, Coffee Shop which has a couple other quotes that we can all learn from. We all base our decisions, choices and reactions on our emotions more than on realities.

We are all so quick to judge others based on what we see before we even get the chance to fully hear what someone has to say and to explain what they want to explain before making any quick judgements. Remember, there are always two sides to every story. So we have to try our best to try to see the other person’s story and to ask questions when we don’t understand something that they are explaining about their side of the story.

With other decisions that we all make every day, we base off of realities and then label the rest on impossible and also that it’s not “realistic”. But I have some news for you: it may not be what’s realistic to us in our current generation in time but that doesn’t mean it can’t one day change. The world is constantly moving and changing every single second. So don’t we think we should change with it?

So my next thoughts here are that we should start working on this. And by that I mean: “the best way to predict the future is to create it”. As this quote follows, I believe that even though we have a bad habit of saying certain things aren’t realistic, we should focus on the question that we should ask ourselves: how badly do you want that particular dream/results/outcome to become part of our current reality? How badly do you want that something to be a part of real life? If you want it badly enough, you will do whatever you gotta do to make it happen.

Stop looking at moments when you see a moment saying to you that you should give up or that it’s not meant for you in your life. If you want something badly enough, you gotta work hard to earn it. You are what you allow, so allow yourself to put in all the necessary work to earn the reality you want to live. So get to work and create the life you want, not the reality our society demands us to give into.

They base too many decisions on emotions, and not enough on realities. But the bottom line is your in too deep to get out. ~ Coffee Shop

Even though life and people can take things away from us (all kinds of things and moments), but that doesn’t mean that it’s showing us our destiny or what’s meant to happen for us. If you want something to happen and things aren’t working out the way you wanted it to, start by looking at the whole picture.

And see what you may be doing wrong or what isn’t working out properly with positive success. And then find all the possible solutions and make your decision on what makes more logical sense (not by our emotions but with logic: some emotion but with logic too: you call that: emotional intelligence). And then get to work, and if it doesn’t work out with 100% success, see what isn’t working and be optimistic and creative and keep trying until you get the results that you want. Trust me, I followed this with my mental health recovery.

I did whatever I had to do regardless of how scared, hopeless and uncomfortable I felt throughout the process. I knew that it was a good thing and to keep going, and I did and I have been succeeding with this method ever since. Though still practicing self care, self love, and other important mental health practices (meditation, mindfulness, emotional intelligence, silencing the mind, gratitude, etc) while working on my own project: me!

It’s not what they take away from you that counts, it’s what you do with what you have left. ~ Max, Coffee Shop

There’s the trailer for Hedley’s “Hello” album on YouTube that I would like to talk about. I’m gonna break down parts of it and talk about my own experiences and what I have taken from them.

The first time I told a girl I loved her was in a song. Life can be terrifying. Accepting the doubt, embracing the challenge. The moment you realize you could surprise yourself, is the moment you realize you get up everyday.

Life can be really scary in many moments of any human’s life. Taking responsibility for yourself, owning up to your mistakes, acting like a mature adult, growing up, entering new stages/chapters of your life, achieving milestones, experiencing new things for the first time, facing challenges, struggles, and much more.

Sometimes more often then not, we can find ourselves able to surprise ourselves with how much we can actually take in one day, to what we can actually accomplish when we don’t overthink, or let our stress, worry, guilt, fears, anxiety, panic, depression or shame get in the way of succeeding in any area of life. We can surprise ourselves which can be part of why we get up everyday. It’s not only a purpose that becomes the reason why we get up everyday but also wanting to surprise ourself and others and to be all that we can be and achieve the life we want to.

What is it about communicating that can be so difficult?

Shame, guilt, fear, worry, stress, anxiety, panic, depression, stigma and judgements from society to name a few. Communicating can have it’s many problems that can cause problems in being and remaining honest, truthful, keeping healthy relationships with people. Some problems that can affect one’s honesty, truthfulness, and healthy lifestyle are: shame, guilt, fear, worry, stress, anxiety, panic, depression (inner demons that come with mental illnesses), stigma and the negative kind of judgements we are without a doubt likely to receive.

Though as hard as it may sound, if we wanna work and improve ourselves and live a better life without letting any of these things get in the way of the things we want; we gotta take risks (and the right ones), step outside of our comfort zones, challenge ourselves and work hard to keep progressing and achieving great amounts of success. No matter how small, they matter and they are good enough. And they are proof that you are trying. It’s better to try and fail then to never try at all.

We gotta also work on beating that stigma and any other problems that have previously in the past stopped/prevented us from seeking the help we need and with working on ourselves to become healthier, happier, content, confident, and proud human beings. We gotta try and we gotta remind ourselves of why we are doing this? For ourselves and that’s not too selfish at all.

Why do I feel anxiety around people and then lonely when I’m not?

We all have our own struggles that we struggle with but we are all human beings, we make mistakes and we all come out of them differently than each individual. We can find ourselves feeling anxiety when in crowds or with any small or big groups and then lonely when we are alone. That can be hard to be in the middle of both: stable.

We all need our alone time. It’s the kind of times where we can learn about ourselves, work on ourselves, spend time alone to heal on our own time, away from people. Some people like extroverts want to socialize and be with groups all the time and never be alone. The other kind of extroverts want a bit of both. And then there’s the introverts who don’t like spending too much time socializing with groups and more time alone. We all have our reasons and preferences of what we like and want more of.

But sometimes that can become quite the struggle and problem when we may not be given the opportunities and chances to have what we want: enough alone time with peace and quiet. Peace of mind is something we all should dedicate some time each day. Spend some time meditating, do some yoga, or anything that you can do in peace on your own unless you may prefer doing in a class with a teacher and others. And that’s completely fine but it’s important and importantly a vital part for your health to spend a little time alone.

If you live/suffer with depression, check out this link attached in text about Tumblr’s Depression Connection. You will be surprised by what you learn and gain from this article.

Our ability to make a connection with others has always been so important. Without music it could be impossible. Music has always played an important role in our ability to express ourselves.

Communication is so important. And it’s just as important to communicate in healthy ways even for those of us who live/suffer with mental illness and/or addiction. Mental illness is way more common than you may think: every 1 in 4 people have a mental illness.

Though when it comes to music whether we are the kind of person who likes writing music or listening to music, it always helps to express ourselves and also to heal ourselves in all different kinds of moments when we need music for our therapy to recover or think more clearly when we are experiencing racing thoughts, anxiety, stress, overthinking, etc.

But sometimes some people may not get the message or relatable story that some songs that we can relate to, understandable for others who may not have experienced anything to relate and understand. Music is something that we can all use to express what we are feeling, thinking, or experiencing. And even inspire others through our own experiences and what we have learned from them.

Why do we text instead of calling?

So many of us are tech-savvy and have a habit of texting instead of calling or talking to someone in person verbally. Especially when they are sitting right next to you. Believe me and anyone who owns up to doing so: I’ve texted my best friend when she was sitting right next to me in the car many times. But for a year at least we’ve stopped doing that and been either texting, or calling whenever we can find time in our busy schedules or talking when we spend time together.

Sometimes texting can feel like less courage or strength is needed to say things that take risks and guts to say to anyone whether it’s a classmate, friend, acquaintance, best friend, family, or anyone at all. It’s that stigma, shame and judgement we feel that stops us from saying what we feel. Just like Phil Collins says in a few lyrics in “You’ll Be In My Heart”:

Why can’t they understand the way we feel? They just don’t trust what they can’t explain. I know we’re different but deep inside us, we’re not that different at all.

And same goes for this next lyric that basically says that we shouldn’t listen to them and that we need each other. This song is definitely worth a listen and a few short minutes of your time: “Don’t listen to them. Cause what do they know. We need each other, to have, to hold. They’ll see in time, I know. When destiny calls you, you must be strong. I may not be with you, but you got to hold on.”

What is it about connecting with others that I’m missing?

Connecting with others and not have anything get in the way of anything that we want to earn and gain is not that easy to get. If we want something, even when we come to obstacles, we gotta be strong enough to not let it change our direction or lose what hope and all else that we have to earning what we want. And the reason why we are doing what we are doing in the first place.

Connecting on a level where nothing can get you down or change your direction or mood/thoughts/beliefs of continuing on the journey to gain the outcome you want; takes a lot in you. You gotta really work hard and give it everything you’ve got. And that makes you wonder how you can find yourself to succeed when it takes everything you’ve got. You are probably wondering how its possible when you are using everything you have to earn the things in your life that you want?

Well it’s not an easy thing is the first thing I’m gonna tell you. Anyone who stands by these words, believe them. It may be hard, but it will be worthwhile in the end. Trust me and anyone who says the same.

Why is expression so important?

Expression is so important because it can say a lot about any one person and can give certain qualities as their personality and other character traits. Expressing yourself can be challenging when society is so convincing to be limited by how far you can go with expressing yourself. Though they can limit you as far as convincing you to be someone that you are not or the complete opposite of who you are or who you want to become. And that includes for those who are in the working process of becoming the full person that they truly and honestly want to be.

It can take a lot of your time and all that you have to make yourself who you want to be without letting anything such as shame, fear, worry or anything that has been previously listed. But a lot of times, it’s a good idea to go out and explore and experience new things which involves stepping outside of your comfort zone, challenging yourself (if you aren’t already doing so) and trying new things. But it can also have it’s fun benefits such as learning interesting things about the world, things, people and new qualities that we can gain that can form into the person we are becoming! The world and you can surprise you especially when you least expect to.

Travel everywhere, meet everyone, go where you’ve always dreamed of going.

Hello means connection. Hello means expression. Sometimes all you really need is to pick up the phone and say hello.

Let’s take a little time to spend off the virtual world (off all social media sites and online games) and just be in the moment. Do something fun, go outside and play a sport, activity, try something new, eat something new from a different culture or religion.

All you can change is yourself, but sometimes that changes everything. ~ Gary Goldstein

Sometimes not at first but along the journey we learn that changing ourself can change everything because they opened up many new opportunities and chances to experience new things that we couldn’t before.

One clap, two clap, three clap, forty?

By clapping more or less, you can signal to us which stories really stand out.