How the Inch Stole Lingerie Day
A holiday parody with reverence to Dr. Seuss
Every Shmoo down in Shmooville liked Lingerie Day a lot
But the Inch who lived just North of Shmooville did not!
The Inch hated Lingerie Day! The whole Lingerie season!
Now, please don’t ask why. No one quite knows the reason.
Staring down from his cave with a sour, Inchy frown
At the warm lighted windows below in their town,
For he knew every Shmoo down in Shmooville beneath
Was busy now hanging a hollyshmoo wreath.
“And they’re hanging their stockings,” he snarled with a sneer.
“Tomorrow is Lingerie Day! It’s practically here!”
Then he growled, with his Inch fingers nervously drumming,
“I must stop Lingerie Day, to keep the Shmoos from cumming!
For, tomorrow, I know all the Shmoo girls and boys
Will wake bright and early. They’ll rush for their toys!
And then! Oh, the noise! Oh, the noise! Noise! Noise! Noise!
There’s one thing I hate! All the NOISE! NOISE! NOISE! NOISE!
