The Seven Social media Sins… and how to not get blocked on Facebook

Do you want to be a socially accepted as a digital member of society? Are you starting to get less likes on your status and don’t know why?

Don’t fret, I am here to share with you the unwritten rules of Facebook that will help you become a polite social media user in this digital world.
On our journey I will also tell you why some people do fall for some of these deadly sins.

1. Do not like your own picture, status, or comment.

No one likes an egomaniac; you might as well say outright how great and witty you are.

2. Refrain from selfie sprees.

One picture of you is great, 5–10 in the space of 15 minutes not so much.
No, I haven’t forgotten what you look like, nor will I because your face is now engrained in my retinas.

These are 2 two of the worst sins you may fall into.

Facebook is this monster that has made narcissists out of the majority of our population. Even though we all realise it, we have to skilfully hide it so we’re still accepted by people.

Facebook is the perfect cocktail: a medium that focuses much of our attention on ourselves, while appearing to focus our attention on relationship with others.

We aren’t born horrific self gratifying monsters, we learn it from those around us. According to Ryan and Xenos because Facebook encourage its users to self-promote through photos and status updates “the prevalence of narcissistic individuals on Facebook may lead to a rise in narcissistic behaviour among users in general”.

Yet, it’s more likely those narcissists actually have low self esteem. Facebook stimulates our want to be popular and liked by everyone, which is why you may be getting friend requests from people you had forgotten.

That girl in high school who was a bit tubby and got bullied for it, she’s now super hot and she knows it. She will then try to friend you because she wants you to know it too.

Continuing on…

3. Stay away from vague statuses.

E.g. “Don’t you hate people who just [fill with very specific detailed events about a particular someone who offended you].”
Leading to an “OMG what happened???” comment from a friend, with a “message me” reply.

If I wanted to take part in a “who done it?” game, I would buy Cluedo.

On that note, if you’re going to tempt me like that…

4. Have the courtesy to keep me updated on everything that happens.

What else am I going to do when my TV dramas are on reruns?

Though, even if you do follow rule 4 you can’t get away from it.

Facebook taps into the voyeuristic tendencies of human nature. We spy on others and frankly we even spy on animals.

You remember that friend from sins 1 and 2? She sits on Facebook relishing every status about what’s wrong in your life.

Nevertheless, voyeurism is also about looking to those around us for social cues in constructing our social identity. It is a safer more powerful form of observation where we are safely hidden from judgement but can still judge others. We use Facebook because we want to know your life, we want to compare it to our own, we want to know where we stand in our social environment.

Though, this isn’t true voyeurism.

“Voyeurism is what happens when you steal glimpses into people’s lives they don’t intend for you to see. The people I’m looking at want me to see everything I’m seeing. They want me to know what they’re eating, wearing, feeling and thinking in each moment. They are actually exhibitionists”

Honestly, we’re all both exhibitionists and voyeurs because first we need to see what others are doing, and then create an image of ourselves that we deem acceptable. We are showing these “friends” how much better we are doing than them.

“…you want to present the best version of yourself […] It’s kind of a social politeness. Facebook elevates the social nicety of someone asking how you are to an art form. The answer becomes not just ‘fine’ but ‘look how fine I am. I’m so fine”

Social identity construction is great, but that being said…

5. Do not poke me. Do not poke anyone.

If you have, congratulations, you have successfully made me feel uncomfortable without actually interacting with me.

However, if your desire is too strong, first consider what life choices brought you to this moment.
Do you go around poking people in person you reprobate?

So, don’t be surprised when I say…

6. Reconsider game requests.

No, I don’t care that you need to build a barn on Farmville to feed your animals; in fact I didn’t care the last 15 times either.
Also, thank you for squashing all my joy because of your misleading notification.

and…

7. Resist the urge to like photos and statuses that are over a year old

… in fact even over half a year is bad.
Unless it’s your bestie, everyone will know you for the voyeur you are.

Facebook can be a minefield and is just as constricted by social norms as our pre-existing society. Remember that everything you see on Facebook is someone’s carefully constructed image, so just be mindful not to compare your “behind-the-scenes” to someone’s movie.

Hopefully these tips can help you sustain healthy digital relationships, for now.
If you still feel unsure, here are links to more tips on avoiding a Facebook Faux Pas.