How to take care of yourself?
The importance of self-care in leadership
How do you take care of yourself? As leaders, we have a tendency to put other people’s needs before ours. We believe that, if we take care of the team, the team will take care of us. But how does the team know what you need to replenish your own batteries? The only one that can take care of yourself is, well, yourself. I will not bore you with the long list of studies that shows that the better care leaders take of themselves, the more productive they are as well as the more productive their teams are. And you will be surprised how willing your team is to support you on that endeavor, since other studies said, employees enjoy working with leaders that prioritize their own wellbeing.
As I mentioned in a previous article, depending on what source you look at, there are four (Center for Creative Leadership) or five (Gallup) elements that you need to look at when managing your wellbeing. I will present the four aspects that I personally focused on, providing you with some examples on how those factors apply to me. The way that you choose to serve each area, may strongly vary from person to person. Find your own way to self-care.
Health and Exercise -As the Latin saying by Juvenal goes “Orandum est ut sit mens sana in corpore sano”, which translates to “a person should pray for a healthy mind in a healthy body”. This quote was later adjusted to our saying of “a healthy mind in a healthy body”. Research suggests that there is a strong link between a good health and a healthy mind. In particular, most research centers around the benefits of exercise for a healthy brain. I recently read a study that asked people to solve different problems in a creative manner, and those individuals were presented with the problems while walking in a treadmill were able to come up with more creative solutions. More interestingly, the benefits from their treadmill workout extended to their work sitting at a desk. Personally, I need to work out. I try to hit the 150-minutes of cardio per week recommended by physicians. I am also the guy that you will see parking as far from the door as possible. And I also know that, when my exercise needs to happen in the morning.
And exercise does not need to be within the compounds of a gym. There are simple steps that anyone can take to get their steps in for the day. You know many of them — take the stairs instead of the elevator (when possible); walk when you are on the phone; stand up from your desk every 40–45 minutes and do some resistance exercise. Another example, and one of my favorites, is walking meetings. It promotes collaboration and provides a different perspective to the conversation that usually lands with more creative outcomes.
Wellbeing and Community– You may define your community as your family and close-friends. Maybe it goes further to your extended family and your acquaintances. Maybe you belong to different networks such as your college alumni, your professional association or your faith-based community. Most research suggests that most individuals cannot keep in touch with a network larger than 150 people. Regardless of your definition, who are those people that energize you? Who are those people that you would define as energy vampires? Who are the people that you turned to when you need help? What do you do to keep in touch with your energizing community members?
In my case, I have several groups that energize me. My family provides me with tons of energy. I look forward to our evening dinners. As you probably remember from previous posts, I love to cook. And I particularly love to cook for others. Most evenings, I will cook a meal that we will share, while talking about our days, sometimes talking about what day events we are grateful about and hopefully, laughing a bit as well. At the end of the dinner, I believe that we are all in a better place, ready to wrap up the day and prepare for the following one.
Most of my family is in Spain. Thanks to today’s technology, we make sure to share with each other what’s happening in our respective sides of the Atlantic. I share birthday events, graduation events, special and not-so-special meals, little jokes, pictures showing what’s happening today (like the snow that we recently got here in Colorado Springs in late May). They all share similar information. There is not a day that goes by where someone has not shared a bit of information that connects us all to our roots.
I also have a family hallway in our home, that I update regularly. I enjoy walking through it and pausing, thinking back to that specific moment. Last summer, we (all 24 members of my family- parents, brothers and sister, nephews and nieces) took a cruise through the Baltic sea. Plenty of fresh memories from that trip. Lots of laughs. Lots of meals we shared. Lots of places we visited. Lots of good conversations and catching up. Those pictures are gates into those memories that produce almost as much dopamine as the actual moment did.
Happiness and Work– You have probably heard before the proverb “Choose a job you love, and you will never have to work a day in your life”? It is a saying that has been (wrongly) attributed to the Chinese philosopher Confucius. Well, I used to love what I did at Nokia for more than 17 years and I do love my jobs now as well! Over the last five years, I have been dedicated to one of my passions — education. I currently teach a couple days a week at the College of Business at the University of Colorado and I also facilitate executive workshops with the Center for Creative Leadership. I draw energy from my direct work with students and executives in both settings, and I really get energize preparing that work. Preparing for my lectures and executive workshops allows me to conduct research and expand my own knowledge on topics that I really love — cross-cultural communication, strategic management, marketing, leadership, organizational behavior and pedagogic techniques.
I recently completed my first book on inclusive leadership and bias, entitled “The Shadow of Bias on Leadership”. I researched studies on why we do the things that we do, why we think the way we think, why do we behave as we do, and then I spent a couple of years researching the methodologies that could help us become better leaders and better people. The book will be available in June/July. It involved hours of research and writing over a two-year period… and I enjoyed every second of it. I spent several years, deep in articles, listening to all types of podcasts, reading books that would result in reading other books, talking to other leadership experts and writing, deleting, writing, deleting a bit more, re-writing… and I had to stop myself every single time because I could just keep on researching, reading, writing, deleting and expanding on the topic of leadership, diversity, inclusion, bias, neuroscience… I was telling my wife than when I received the first reviewed version from my editor, with notes, reviews, strikes, suggestions, deletions, questions… I looked at the document, smiled and said out loud — “This is great” . How many jobs have you ever had that when you are told, this is wrong, you actually smile? I welcome the opportunity to improve myself.
And, of course, the best thing about my jobs are the comments and feedback that I receive from my students or participants. Learn how working together positively affected their lives is always a welcome reward.
Creating a routine– We have gone through some of the factors that affects your overall wellbeing. In summary, we are looking how do you take care of your own needs — physical, mental, spiritual and social. In order to have the most effective impact, it is important to create a routine that hits as many of those energizing moments as possible. Those routines may vary depending on your situation and the environment. For example, I have several routines — one for the days that I worked at the University; another for the days that I worked at the Center for Creative Leadership; another one when I travel; one for the weekends.
It is important to understand that, while it would be great to only do those things that energizes us, we still have to do certain things to make our livings, for example, read emails, pay bills, commute to work… your routines should make the most effective use of your time while encompassing all relevant actions… which means that you should also have a good understanding on what are those actions that have no relevant productive impact in your day or even may have a negative impact on your energy level. Yes, I am talking about technology.
I recently read a book on the effects that technology has on our productivity, “Digital Minimalism”[1]. Newport argued that some technology has a negative effect on our productivity and overall happiness. For example, I am a news junkie, but do I really need to get updates on real time on the news? Based on the recommendations from the book, I went through my mobile phone and my laptop, and deleted all notifications. Instead of stopping every time the phone beeps or vibrates, I have set aside time when I sit down and read my news and watch the news. Also, during my workouts, I listen to the BBC and NPR News, as well as a long list of favorite podcasts. I have also stopped the email notifications, checking my email at the end of each hour on the hour. That allows me to be more focused on what I am doing, being more efficient and more effective on those tasks.
As I create my routines, I mix those things that need to be done (teach a class, write an article, grade papers, read emails) with activities that support my own wellbeing (mental, physical, spiritual and social). For example, when I travel to facilitate an executive workshop, my routine starts every day with a 30-minute workout, while I listen to my podcast list. I pick up breakfast in my way up to my room, enjoying some green tea (which I usually travel with) while deleting all the emails that are not relevant. When I am with the customer, I am with the customer. I do not allow other distractions to come between my customer, my work and me. During lunch, I socialized with the participants for most of the hour, and then go for a quick walk around the building, within the building or outside to clear my mind and prepare for the rest of the session. At the end of the session, I usually go back to my hotel to catch up any other important activity (must be read as if this does not happen now, it will negatively affect my work in the short term) and then socialize for dinner with a colleague. After dinner, I catch up on the news, call home to talk to my wife and then disconnect completely doing something mindless such as reading fiction or watching some high-pace television show… anything that does not require much attention or thought. I also make sure that I get my 6.5–7 hours of sleep.
As you can see in that routine, I include several energizing moments — physical exercise, socializing, family communication, facilitating a workshop and eating (yes, I enjoy exploring new cuisines). I also add those activities that need to be done and aim to limit those activities that are the energy vampire — i.e. reading emails, checking your mobile phone (done an average of 85 times in the US).
As we conclude, I invite to think about those activities that bring joy, happiness, and energy to your life as a leader — what are those activities in the four facets (physical, mental, spiritual and social) com that we visited in this blog? What’s the right balance at this point? Also, be aware about those activities that drain the energy from you. Finally, try to identify those habits that you may have that are not necessarily productive or necessary — checking your mobile phone 85 times does not sound as a very effective time management technique. Develop a routine that includes some of those energy-filling activities throughout the day. Try to incorporate them into your normal daily activity (i.e. walking meetings). Remember that sometimes, we need to slow down, in order to speed up. A ten-minute meditation session in the middle of a busy day may look as a waste of time but slowing down for those ten-minutes may make you more productive since it clears your mind and re-energizes you for the next challenge. So, what does your energizing routine look like?
[1]Newport, C. (2019). Digital Minimalism: Choosing a Focused Life in a Noisy World. Penguin.
