Conversations with Daughters
#5 — The would-be suitors
Mia has always been my ‘tellin’ it like it is’ girl. I really hope she goes into stand-up comedy some day, because her deadpan has the potential to be the stuff of legend. Conversations with her are more like speaking to another adult, until I remember that her idea of a good time is eating candy until you hurl…
There’s this boy in her 1st grade class named Robert. I first heard about this Robert as a complaint, when I noticed several hand-drawn cards that she dumped out of the black hole that is her backpack.
Me: Did you draw these? They’re really good.
Mia [nonplussed]: No. Those are from Robert.
Me: Oh…well, he must know how much you love super heroes!
Mia: Yeah. I used to like him, but he’s super annoying now.
Me: How is he annoying?
Mia: He follows me and my friends around, and he’s always telling me how much he likes me. I told Miss A, and she asked him to stop.
Me: Did that help?
Mia: Not really. [shrugs]
Two weeks pass. I notice a few new cards, definitely of the Valentine variety, showing up around the house. Mia’s artwork. Hearts. Hand holding.
The name “Freeman”. (This is my neighbor’s kid, and Mia’s best friend.)
I make mental notes.
Mia: Freeman says he’s going to live alone with he grows up.
Me: Really? Why?
Mia: Because he says marriage is stupid, and it’s a waste of time. (The kid says this frequently. He must have quite a full life.)
Me: [laughing] Is that right? It’s going to be a while before he’s grows up.
I’m pretty sure he’ll change his mind.
Mia: He has to…because I already know who I’m going to marry. And his name begins with an “F.” [sheepish look]
Me: [hmms to self]
That night Mia addresses Valentine’s Day cards for her class. The first one she writes is for Robert, because “he really loves Avengers.”
[nice of her to think of the super annoying kid]
The next day:
Mia: Guess what? Robert is my best friend now!
Me: That’s nice. So…he’s not annoying anymore?
Mia: No…but he still wants me to marry him.
Me: Hmm. Good thing you don’t need to make a decision right now then.
Do you think Freeman will care?
Mia: [shrugs] They’ll probably have to battle over me some day…
Can I eat my candy now?
Me: Sure, honey.
[I think we may possibly need to cut back on the super hero movies.]
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