Signs Your Life No Longer Fits Your Creative Needs, and How to Make Change

C. Hogan
The Kriative Introvert
5 min readJan 27, 2022
Person trying to pull a sweater on but getting stuck inside.
Photo by Mukuko Studio on Unsplash

Before I started rebuilding my life to better serve my creative introvert soul, I felt depleted and overwhelmed most of the time. I was balancing raising three kids with my husband and handling most of the domestic side of our lives, while trying to carve out time for my creative passion projects, like writing kidlit, and working as a freelance writer across multiple fields. It was a lot, and I had very few effective tools to help me recover each time I hit burnout. I wasted a lot of time beating myself up for not being able to do it all, all the time.

But then in 2016, on the verge of turning 40, I experienced a big life shakeup. There are many kinds of mid-life transitions — divorce, widowhood, job loss, move, family drama, or even trauma. For me, the shakeup was spiritual. I left a religious tradition I’d been previously devoted to for 39 years. My marriage, my family life, my identity were suddenly up for renegotiation.

I began to realize that my life wasn’t entirely congruent with the deepest parts of me. I made too many choices — big and small — based on social and religious conditioning. Since those choices weren’t made from my true self, they left me feeling disillusioned and unsatisfied. My life was like a sweater I picked out in college that no longer fit me. It was too tight in places, too big in others, full of holes, and no longer my style. As a result, whenever I tried to reach for my creative dreams I felt restrained.

Some people might get a divorce or a Porsche next. I cut my hair and started yoga teacher training. Luckily, my marriage not only survived that transition and renegotiation but my partner and I are thriving and growing together because of it. Things are less simple now, but I wouldn’t go back to the way things were for anything. (And yes, my hair is still short, and we’re still driving the same Mazda 5.)

With the help of my yoga teacher training (and a whole lot of personal work) I learned how to recognize the signs of depletion and how to care for myself. I learned to honor my very real needs as a creative introvert and accept the challenges and gifts of my makeup. I developed powerful tools to care for myself and my loved ones. I let go of freelance projects that earned me money but kept me from having the space to develop my most powerful, most meaningful creative work yet.

Now I have what I need to reach forward, to share my work with the world without being taken down by a case of overwhelm, self-doubt, or the introvert flu. (Not that these things have gone away entirely, but I have more awareness around them, which can make all the difference.) I’m still learning like everyone else, still growing. But I don’t feel stuck any more. I don’t feel powerless and hopeless or like a stranger inside my own life. I feel like ME.

Why am I sharing this very personal story? Because many creative introverts have a similar story of trying to fit into someone else’s mold. And because through that difficult time, and with the help of my yoga teachers, I started the journey to rebuild my life around what really matters to ME: my health, my relationships, and my creative work.

So. Back to the title of this post. Whether you identify as an introvert or have been through a similar big life change, you may recognize what it feels like to live and create while depleted, to fight against your life instead of having a life built to support you. Likely, you’re so familiar with the feelings of exhaustion, the weariness, the overwhelm that you think you ARE those things. This is just what it means to be you. You snap at people you love. You get angry for no reason. You feel alone and like no one really sees or understands the real you.

But that is not who you are. It is just how you survive when you don’t have a better way, a way that can lead to thriving.

You can feel regular bouts of spontaneous joy in your daily life. Relief at being free from all that’s held you back in the past. You can practice acceptance for all the ups and downs of being an introvert and learn to honor your needs. You can talk back to those nasty, internalized voices that tell you it’s not worth it, you’re too much, no one wants to hear what you have to say. You can learn to reset your nervous system and recover your energy. You can insert tiny, daily habits that help you maintain your energy through life’s joys and challenges. You can reach farther, live bigger, and dream in brighter colors.

Are you ready?

If this sounds like you, and you’re ready to rebuild a life that supports and sustains YOU, it’s simpler than it sounds. But it takes time, and it’s a heck of a lot more fun if you can do it with the support of community and someone else who’s been there. I’m grateful for the help of my yoga teachers, my writing mentors, my friends and family, and my partner for walking with me through the past six years.

You may be so overwhelmed though that you feel weary considering any change. If that’s the case, don’t be discouraged. You can start with one small act each day like I did. Insert real, effective self care into your daily routine. These are not the things other people tell you you should do to relax. This is not your To Do list disguised as self care. This is an exploration of what you really enjoy, what feels good and inserting then into your day, every day.

Still not sure where to get started? Download your free Weekly Energy Planner and get a more detailed plan on how to reduce overwhelm and increase the slice of energy you have available to make larger, more meaningful changes.

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C. Hogan
The Kriative Introvert

Writer. RYT 500 yoga teacher. Passionate about helping creatives craft sustainable lives. Editor @ The Kriative Introvert.