Amenities
About the importance of amenities and good food to a human’s life
I was sitting on a train minding my own business when I overheard a conversation. A guy, two seats ahead of me was talking on his cell phone with a lawyer.
“Hello, Leo. I want you to testify for Jimi in court, he doesn’t have to go to prison.”
Leo replied. “I was in prison for two and a half years. It’s not so bad, they serve good food, hot meals, and you have a daily routine. Nobody is waiting for you outside. Besides, Jimi could make new friends, he is hanging out with some bad company nowadays.”
“What? But he wants to be a free man. He’s a good person!”
“The man who steals bikes for a living? And picks old ladies' pockets? Give me a break.”
“By the way, they got these dudes in the kitchen, their pasta is really good. Twins, they call them, K1 and K2, because they are so big. Apparently, their family owns a restaurant. Their competitor had a sequence of unfortunate accidents. Very unfortunate. That’s how the two Ks ended up in prison. Of course, they protest their innocence every time you ask them, but that’s another story. There is also tuna for lunch, right out of the can.”
“Really? Jimi’s favorite food is tuna. I will pass this information along.”
“Hi Leo, it’s Jimi.”
“Yo, how’s it hanging Jimi?”
“Do they have, you know, on the inside, weight-lifting machines?”
“Of course! They have a good selection, the guys spend a lot of time at the gym.”
“This is sounding pretty good. Especially the bit about the tuna. Last question, can I bring my golden chopsticks with me?”
“Well, they don’t allow those in the prison, they say they could be used for nefarious purposes.”
“Oh. I thought this was going to work out,” Jimi said. “I’m pleading not guilty. You had me going for a while, but the chopsticks — they’re a present from my grandmother.”
