Learning Resilience, the Most Important Skill
Overcoming challenges is how we find out who we truly are
This story is contributed by a Tutor.id tutor, Diogo
One of my very first private students, George, helped me truly understand what it means for a child to overcome educational challenges. Often, it’s not really about the material or even study habits. This child’s story of overcoming difficulties helped me appreciate the importance of tutoring and continues to inspire me to this day.
Geroge’s mother contacted me looking for math tutoring for her son. We set a date, and I went to get to know him. The mother told me that her son had changed schools earlier in the year.
After the move, she noticed that he was struggling in class. After a conversation with the school counselor, she went to a doctor. And then to another one.
After a conversation with the psychologists, Geroge was given a diagnosis: Attention Deficit Disorder.
I won’t lie, I felt intimidated when I heard this. I worried that I won’t be able to do much for George. This was one of my first private teaching clients, and I agonized over the responsibility I had to this child.
With the weight of worry on my mind, I went on to talk to George. He was a pleasant and seemingly bright child. We talked about his family move and changing school, as well as the difficulties he had in math classes. He felt along, displaced, and thought the subject was dense and difficult. Considering he was in a track that involved rigorous exams to move on to the next grade, his experience was not unique.
When I heard him describe his school life, I immediately suspected that his class performance had to do a lot more with his emotional state, rather than with the difficulty of the material. After taking a look at his homework assignment, however, I had to concede that it was probably a combination of the two. This was a tough mix, and for a young teacher, this felt like a significant challenge.
George has already taken two of his four bimonthly exams, scoring poorly on both. We decided on an aggressive schedule of three sessions per week in order to review and reinforce what he was learning in school, and fill any gaps he had before the next exam.
Over the next few weeks, we reworked all the assignments on his list, and though the going was tough, he did manage to finish all the work. It may have taken him a bit longer to finish, but he managed admirably.
The date of the next exam came. His scores improved, but, they were still far below the mark for being able to move to the next grade. The improvement in his scores was notable, a cause to celebrate. Still, his mother was worried that he would be held back a grade, understandably.
At the end of that session, I asked George the question that turned out to be crucial in this story. I told him to look at the grade of the last exam and asked if he believed he could do it.
He nodded his head “Yes”.
So, I told him that I would work with him not only on learning the material, but making it so he would need less and less help from me. In essence, I asked him to start thinking not just about the material, but the ways in which he approached learning altogether.
After many hours of hard work, the date of the last, crucial test arrived. His grade has improved significantly, but it was still not enough to pass.
George had just one last chance. He could do a make-up test, which would take place a week later. This test would contain the material from the entire year, and he had to score at least 70% to pass. This was a major challenge.
During that week, we had class from Monday to Saturday, reviewing everything that was possible. In my absence, Geroge also reworked the problems on the previous exams, learning from his mistakes.
Two days after the test, I sent a message to George’s mother, asking how he did. He scored a 55%, but instead of simply being held back, Geroge’s mother was asked for a meeting with the teacher instead.
Geroge’s teacher was impressed at how much he improved over the course of the semester. Despite not quite making the grade, he was being moved up. His teacher, seeing his improvement, thought that he would be able to catch up to the program.
The following year, I was asked to conduct a few more sessions with George, usually on dates before a major test. He was improving greatly, taking to hear my advice about how he could improve and learn without the aid of a tutor.
2020 has been a confusing and strange year, with few opportunities for good news. Today, in the crazy midst of a world-wide pandemic, I got some good news after all. Apparently, George is a single test away from graduation. Despite his significant challenges, Geroge had made it. He also learned how to learn, despite difficulties, a key life skill for success.
The reason this story has a happy ending is that three key elements came together. First, a thoughtful and kind school teacher who recognized that progress was a more important indicator than a grade. The second, a student who believed in himself and persisted despite the challenges. Finally, the support he received, a tutor who encouraged him not only to learn better but learn how to learn better as well.
Of course, I am proud of George’s performance. Teaching him has taught me a lot more about my profession, as well as what it takes to succeed.
