Political Satire
How Donald Trump Claims He Can Win California with Divine Help
Will Moses part the Potomac so the former president can reach the White House?
Donald Trump told Dr. Phil in a friendly interview or was it a Jesus-filled rant something bizarre —
I guarantee you, if Jesus came down and was the vote counter, I would win California.
JESUS, DONALD TRUMP! REALLY?
Supposedly, because Jesus is the only “honest vote counter.” Can Jesus count? Up to ten. We know that much. Would Jesus help a man liable for sexual assault? How about someone who breaks the Ninth Commandment — constantly? For all you atheists, that’s the one that says, “Thou Shalt Not Bear False Witness.” In other words, LIE!
How many Commandments has Trump broken?
Does Donny think after getting grazed by that bullet he now sees Jesus? Does he have the sixth sense? Just a charlatan!
Is the former president feeling like he’s losing evangelicals? He needs to invoke a higher power every once in a while.
What if Jesus tallies the votes? Maybe he doesn’t want Donny to win.
