The 3 Must-Haves Rule: Owning Up to Your Choices
“It takes a village to raise a child” -African Proverb. Learn how Patricia Feria went from a liberal arts student to investment banker to Chief Strategic Resource Officer at Teach for the Philippines.
Teach for the Philippines is a for-purpose, non-stock, non-profit organization that works to provide all Filipino children with an inclusive, relevant, and excellent education.
I’d always thought of Pat Feria as someone who had a deep understanding of what it meant to be good. Since interning at Teach for the Philippines a few summers ago, I’d noticed her intense desire to give back to her home country fueled by her equally intense work ethic. She is extremely knowledgeable and passionate about the education sector of the Philippines; when she talks there is a drive in her voice that betrays how much time she has probably spent thinking about the topic.
Pat first left for the United States to study economics at the University of Pennsylvania. She then went on to pursue a career in finance: first in New York City, where she spent four years in Global Corporate Banking at Citi, then in Connecticut, where she worked at a hedge fund. After ten years of living abroad, Pat returned to the Philippines, where she joined the Teach for the Philippines’ Senior Leadership in late 2012. Today, she serves as the organization’s Chief Strategic Resources Officer.
Without meaning to, Pat has become one of the people I looked up to the most. When asked if she would do it again, she quickly responds, “Yes! Without even batting an eye.”
How did you develop your work ethic?
It started when I was much younger. I had atypical Asian parents who said, just try your best. Fast forward to about a decade ago, when I started out in Finance in New York as a liberal arts major at Penn. Here I was, wide-eyed and fresh from the Philippines. I said, “Oh I want to try Wall Street,” because why not? But I was so far behind from those with accounting and finance degrees who were entering the industry at the same time I was. That was the first wakeup call wherein I couldn’t just do a little bit of work and still get good results. The minute I got into the working world, it was night and day. I couldn’t just coast.
Investment banking is about 100 hours a week. You can do the math to see how many hours I slept. That actually meant working 7 days a week. What I think sets someone apart from those who only last a couple of weeks into it is that you realize no job is beneath you. Investment banking was also humbling. Work just got done. The office is closed and you need to print 100 pages and punch holes and bind them together, after working from 8 in the morning to 11:59, you need to put those packets together because in the morning they’re going to get shipped to where the next meeting is. I didn’t realize that work ethic of staying up. All-nighters in college don’t count because you asked for it: you crammed and you needed to finish something. Here, I had to and that was 24/7 for me in the office. That was when, I think, it really became real.
How do you spend Sunday?
I don’t have a typical Sunday. I know I walked away from banking and that was because I had no ability to spend time with the people who mattered most to me. When I first worked in banking, I was told to make a list of the 100 most important things to me. So I did. Then I was told, cut out the 97 and throw those away. The three are what you will hold true and the rest are “nice to haves”. And for me, those were family, my faith and my dear friends. So I came home and I said, “Well those are the things I held true. When I come home, I will have to find the time to make this happen.” For the most part, those are on Sundays because that’s when most people are least busy. No typical Sunday, but there’s Church and there’s lunch with my now 95 year old grandmother. And if I forget, she counts. She’ll say “it’s been 14 days since you last had lunch.” And then dinner now, with my husband’s family.
What is the last thing you’ve done that’s really worth remembering?
I think the most memorable would be leaving what was comfortable. That’s always been the theme of when something amusing and crazy has happened. Leaving the Philippines to go to the US in between sophomore and junior year. Going to New York as a liberal arts major and going to finance. And then most recently, leaving the US in 2012, with no plan, no job. I knew I was coming home so that was comforting, but I was leaving what I considered my adult home. Big decisions weren’t to cut or go to class. They were life decisions I had made for the first time when I was then and there. I chose to come here and now I’m here.
What is an odd or unknown interest of yours?
My therapy is cooking and pottery. I’m calmed when I do something with my hands. That’s very strange for someone who works with numbers and in an NGO. When I need to either step back or clear my head, I do that best on the potter’s wheel or in the kitchen cooking a meal.
I first started pottery 14 years ago. And I did two proper classes at Penn and I’ve just been doing it since. It’s weird thing when you say you’re a potter because people have different notions of what pottery is. I do not have the time to make pottery in bulk. But it was odd, the way I got my job in Citi was I connected really well with my interviewer. When she had asked me what my biggest achievement in life was, I said, I made my grandmother’s urn. My other grandmother. This was the way we bonded, how I was taught and everything. I’d still say that was my biggest achievement. She was the one that introduced me to it.
What are the things that stand between you and complete happiness?
Let me give you a story instead of answering that question. When I first moved to Philadelphia and it was my first winter, it was around January. It was dark and grey and the snow turned to ice. I was miserable. I debated whether to go to class or not. I made a choice then, about a few hours in. I made a choice then that I had chosen to come to philly when I was plenty fine in Ateneo. Because I had made the choice to leave the comforts of home, rip out the band aid, I had to make the choice to get up and deal with the grey, cold winter outside. That for me will be the “Pinili mo eh” or “Well you chose this, get over it.”
When I’m here and it’s late, shit’s hitting the fan and we didn’t get the funding we thought we would get. I say, you chose it Patricia, deal with it, now figure out a way to go and get it. I always allow myself the 5 minutes of panicking or crying and running around the building just to calm myself down. I think it’s always a choice. I don’t think I’ll ever get to complete happiness, but at least I know I can control how I react to whatever life throws my way.
Would you rather have a dragon or be a dragon?
Once in a while, I enjoy not having to choose, I’m human! So do I really have to choose? I’ve always wanted to fly and I think you can fly either way. Hmm, have a dragon. Plenty happy already.
Would you rather change gender every time you sneeze or think that every baby you saw was a muffin?
I’d be curious to sneeze and change gender, just to see. I’ve never had a brother so it’d be interesting. Although I do have sneezing fits so that’d be fun.
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N E X T → On Positivity & Mindfulness
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